Taken paths
by JetBlack
Summary: What would happen if Alec was Max and Max was Alec. If they switched roles. AU. Would they have the same angst and chemistry? The same problems? FINISHED (For nc-17 extension of CH 20 go to Gumboot Mafia or The Broken world)
1. Prologue

Title: **Taken Paths**

Author: **_JetBlack_**

Summary: What would happen if Alec was Max and Max was Alec? And if it had been his group instead to escape from Manticore. If everything in season 1 had happened to Alec while Max was still the loyal little Manticore puppet. AU

Disclaimer. You no sue me.

A/N This was a challenge from nunswithpens. At first it was weird writing this. Basically Max and Alec switch bodies. Alec escaped in 09. And basically everything that happened to Max has happened to Alec in this universe, or close to. Alec will have her personality or close to, Max will be sarcastic. Some things I'll have to change, I cant exactly have Alec threaten Max every five seconds of kicking her ass. The first chapter will be in Alec's point of view, sort of like a prologue. Actually it is a prologue what am I saying. See it says right there.

Prologue 

I lay on my bunk staring unblinking at the ceiling; I count the spots that dot its cold cement surface. I still can't believe I'm back here, back at Manticore; it's like my life is starting all over again. 

A cold shiver runs down my spine as I think of the escape; I can still feel the cold sting of the water of when I fell through the ice and Biggs was forced to go on without me. I didn't wanna get split up but Cyd made us. She was our CO and she always knew what to do. Twelve of us escaped that night, I never found out whom, at least not all of them. This past year it seems has been the year for reunions never really on happy terms though. 

When Cyd first found me I'd been staying in Seattle, had been for three years. The four-room apartment I shared with Original Cindy and Sketchy was cramped but it was home. I'd spent the first ten years of my life learning the fine art of assassination only to spend the next ten always on the run, always looking over my shoulder but Seattle had felt right and I'd stayed. I had a job, friends, a life, but Cyd hadn't seemed to understand that. She'd wanted me to relocate but I couldn't leave. 

I miss everything right now; Jampony, Crash, hanging with the gang and scoping out the girls with OC and Sketch. For some reason beyond me I even missed Normal the uptight bigot. And then there is Asha. Somehow when I broke into that little dingy apartment to steal that TV I'd never expected to be met by a 44 millimeter pointed to my head and some blonde S1W member wanting to fight the good fight. But in all the chaos we built a friendship and it was because of her that I found my siblings, the few that I saw again. 

Pix had always been quiet back at Manticore, I remember her short chestnut hair cut in the classic Manticore buzz cut. When I saw her again she wasn't so good. We did everything to save her, we captured Lydecker, we got ourselves caught, Cyd and me got her out but in the end we couldn't cure progeria. It was her decision and we respected it and I promised my soul that we'd go back for her. 

So much stuff happened this last year. 

OC found out about me, it wasn't my fault but in the end she dealt and things went back to normal, or as normal as they could be. 

I got to see Jesse again, she had the life we all wanted; a family, she even had a little boy. Life is never easy for us and in the end it didn't end well. It ended as well as it could for us. And through all of this Asha and me got closer, I helped her deal when her fellow S1W member died in a shooting and she helped me when I found Sam. 

I never did tell her what had happened, because I don't even want to know myself. Every time I think of her the guilt is unbearable and it feels like I'm there again in the woods with the helicopters closing in. Sam had always been so innocent, so understanding and loyal. Even though she was younger than I was she'd protect me, all of us. 

And then on the outside everything changed, but she hadn't. She'd always stayed in the mind of a nine-year-old. Nothing made any more sense to her, she couldn't find reason and so she started killing. She'd draw her barcode on the back of her victims' necks and then hunt and kill them. She was killing herself over and over. She'd give the teeth to the Blue Lady. 

Sam believed in her. 

When I tried to stop her she got hurt; there was no way we could have gotten out together so she begged me. I've never forgiven myself and I still carry her burden. I suppose I always will. Then two weeks ago Cyd, Hyph, Sprit and me found ourselves allying with our own personal Satan to take down Manticore to stop running. At the cost of Cyd. 

She'd always said emotions were weaknesses that it was all phony sentimentality but in the end I guess she didn't believe it as much as she used to. Her heart beats in my chest now; it hurts to even think about it, to know that she loved that much, that she was willing to sacrifice her own life. 

I lay on my bunk and stare unblinking at the ceiling. 374 dots color its cement surface. 

The sound of metal clanging breaks me out of my thoughts and I sit up watching the door slide open and then she walks in.


	2. M A X

**Disclaimer**

This chapter is dedicated to scarlet.

**Part 2**

The tight gray shirt stuck to her chest and the military issue boots she was wearing were remarkably quiet. Her hair was dark and long, swishing noiselessly around her as she looked at Alec in curiosity.

For a second he couldn't breath and the only thing he felt was the painful beating of his far too hopeful heart about to be crushed. No thought went through his mind. Manticore, Asha, the loosened bricks under his bed; none of it existed.

"Sam?" his voice was croaky and his deep hazel eyes widened in surprise and trepidation.

The female X5 didn't respond but simply raised her eyebrows in confusion. Alec watched a spark glimmer behind her eyes and then it was gone replaced by a grin, "You mean 453. Your fellow traitor. Went psycho," she drawled and then the grin was back, "My designation is 452. Come on let's get this over with."

Alec was still too shocked to speak but he managed to swallow, hard and finding his voice he mused mostly to himself, "You must have been twinned. What do you know about it anyway?"

The X5 rolled her eyes and explained, "I know that because of her I had to have an extended vacation in Psy-Ops, they wanted to make sure it wasn't genetic." His eyes widened at her words but they completely bulged when her hands went to her top. 

He jumped up from his cot and halted her hands half way up, "What are you doing?"  
  
The darker female stopped at his hands; "We've been paired off. I'm your breeding partner. We're supposed to copulate every night until I get pregnant. It's your own fault anyway. If you and your friends hadn't blown up the DNA database, they'd still be whipping up embryos and putting them into surrogates. Take off your clothes."

Alec stood in a phase of shock. His lips were partly opened and she could see the information trying to be processed, "That's sick! I don't care what your orders are, get out of my cell!"   
  
"You know I'm not thrilled of this development myself. You've been out in filth for half your life. I could catch something. Oh, and don't forget I'm just dying to walk around like a beached whale for months. Soldiers aren't meant to be pregnant," Max huffed and lowered her shirt back down, brushing out the imaginary crinkles. 

Alec suppressed the smile that threatened his lips, "Whatever you need to tell yourself. And . . . my name's Alec."

"Was the slight pause to emphasize or can't you form sentences fast enough?" she asked with a smirk sitting down on his vacated cot, "Anyway take a 'chill pill'."

Alec's brow furrowed in confusion at her choice of words. Seeing his hesitation she explained, "I took Common Verbal Usage when I got cleared for my solo missions."  
  
Light dawned on his features and he answered sarcastically, "Oh, you mean assassinations."  
  
452 ignored him and laid down getting comfortable, "It was my job. If you're gonna 'bust my chops' about it, go ahead."

Alec slid down the wall and watched her, studying her carefully and time seemed to whiz by. Sure she looked like Sam, they were identical in fact, but their attitudes were completely different. Sam hadn't even had an attitude, 452 was . . . mouthy.

A grin set on his lips and he spoke breaking the silence, "You should have a name too."

452 didn't even open her eyes but bit back right away, "Cause I'm gonna need it when I go to see the nice doctors and they give me a lollipop when I tell them."

Alec's brow furrowed and he looked to be deep in thought. 452's eyes opened studying him and then looked down at her watch, nearly an hour had passed.

"I'm gonna call you Max," Alec finally said and 452 sat up and quirked an eyebrow, "Max?"

Alec grinned as she stood and called for the guard, "As in Mouthy Aberrant Xerograph. Or you can just say it's short for Maximum."

The X5 grinned and stepping out replied, "I can live with that. See ya around . . . Alec."

**********

Alec watched Renfro in his peripheral vision. Max stood beside him impeccably straight, eyes front, shoulders squared and no emotion whatsoever on her face. If he had never run away he would have been impressed. Yet there was something out of place about her. It was like even though she obeyed, she disobeyed, she had sarcasm, attitude, a personality.

As the blonde got closer and closer asking every pair about their 'copulation' Alec's hatred towards her grew and grew. The sick bitch. If she could she'd probably watch Alec thought.

Despite what he thought of her he kept his emotions behind the mask he'd developed as a kid. A classic giveaway that you came from this hellhole. He didn't want any repeat performances from last time so he just played along with her. He wasn't about to forget who he was anytime soon though. She'd have to realize that.

_"State your designation," Renfro's voice droned over the speaker._

_Alec bet his fist against the one way mirror hitting his reflection, "My name's Alec. Kiss. My. Transgenic. Ass."_

_The ceiling lowered and Alec was forced into a crouch and then a ball. He didn't hear a reply._

The director's piercing voice broke him out of his thoughts and he snapped back to attention, "Report."

Alec didn't reply. He had no idea what to say We Just talked wouldn't go down well. It was Max who spoke up first surprising him but he said nothing going on with her lie, "Successful copulation with X5-494 ma'am. Twice."

Alec held his breath waiting, expecting for her to see through the lie, for the guards to take them to detention for lying but only a self-gloating smile appeared, "Excellent 494."

*********


	3. Musings

**Disclaimer**

**Part 3**

452 stood at attention her eyes staring forward as Renfro paced in front of her. The director seemed to be deep in thought but she'd lost interest in the blonde woman's actions some four minutes ago.

She kept one ear trained on Renfro but the rest of her was far away in thought. Max… Max… she repeated the name inside her own head as if testing it, trying to gauge a reaction to it and wondering why it seemed to feel so right, so familiar. In the end she concluded she liked it. It was short, simple… and to the point, she thought smiling inwardly. Maximum. Well actually Alec had said it stood for Mouthy Aberrant Xerograph but she preferred the other.

She studied and analyzed his words in her mind trying to see what he thought of her. Mouthy. Well for that one she had to agree, so she was a little open and voiced her opinion, big deal. To 452 it was like a big 'screw you' to Manticore; like every thing else she did. She liked to bend and break the rules. She never crossed a certain line, the one that turned you from a nuisance to expendable. She'd never figured out why they kept her, after that incident three years ago she had made it none too subtly clear what she thought of Manticore. 

All the staff and doctors knew about her and everyone still wondered why 452 still ranked as one of the highest, best Manticore had to offer. Max did herself.

452 snorted mentally at having used the name the rogue had given her and her trail of thought was once again placed on Alec's words, aberrant. Sure the X5 could admit she was different, diverse, but the rogue had only just met her. Different how 452 asked herself. What did he know about her?

Xerograph. This was the one that stumped her; the one she'd been trying to figure out all morning and it was why she'd lied. How could she ask him about it if they were both in isolation? 452 ignored the persistent voice that told her there was more to her actions.

"State your designation," Renfro ordered breaking the silence and 452 was jolted out of her musings, "X5-452!" she barked out like the good little soldier she was supposed to be. 

"452 are you aware of your ranking here at Manticore?" the blonde bitch continued. 452 stayed quiet knowing right away the question wasn't one the director wanted answered, "Do you know how you kept that title? Well let me fill in the blanks. I didn't clear your record after every one of your deliberate failings cause I wanted to be friends."

Max didn't move, her eyes only flickered imperceptibly at the woman's words, "Sandeman covered his tracks well but not that well. I knew there was something special about you, something that made you different, worthy of my patience."

452 suppressed the chuckle at the blonde's words; "The chances I gave you paid off. You 452, are perfection. You are what we were striving for. You'll be moved to another facility, there you'll be briefed and trained for your mission. We'll be leaving at 2000 hours. Until then your dismissed from your classes, you may do as you please."

"Yes ma'am," Max replied detachedly.

"Dismissed."

*********

2000 hours

Max… 452 stood next to the HUV and waited for the director. Two black helicopter men waited alongside. They were at the perimeter fence and Max used her vision to zone in on one window. The window she shouldn't be interested in seeing through.

_You need a name too…_

_My designation's 452…_

_You mean 453… went psycho…_

_The straps held her down in place and the laser in her eyes was painful. She fought against the restraints, fighting the images… DUTY… DISCIPLINE… MISSION… TRAITOR…_

_You are nothing 452… you are a soldier… soldiers don't have feelings… they don't have the capacity to love… you're poison… Brendan's death is your fault… it's all your fault… your actions._

_She lay there unmoving her eyes bloodshot looking into space…_

_A shadowed face watched her…_

_You okay… little-fella…_

_Father named me… Joshua… Sandeman named me…_

_Sandeman covered his tracks well…_

_Perfection…_

_BRENDAN!_

_I'm gonna call you Max…_

Footsteps brought her back to the present and Renfro walked towards them with a little smile. Explosions went off behind her and Max saw the building burst into flames.

452's eyes widened in disbelief and she didn't even humor the blonde in hiding her emotion, "We have to go back! We have to help them!" Max shouted knowing the humans wouldn't hear her over the noise of the fire.

"Stand down 452. Our operation was compromised. This is plausible deniability," the bitch explained as if she were talking to a child.

_The other small girl grinned at her showing all her teeth._

_They giggled underneath the covers as their CO watched them hiding his amusement._

_An older boy stood beside her holding her hand, she looked around at her unit, at all the little grief filled bodies, shaking with the unfairness of it all._

The X5 lunged herself at Madame X. She wasn't 452, she wasn't Max, she was the animal hidden inside her. The one each transgenic fought to control. Some more than others. How could she kill them without a second thought? That was her family in there. 

All she heard was the single shot but she felt no pain. She looked at Renfro's face and knew right then who had been hit. The two guards ran off and Max looked back at the older woman, "Find… Sandeman… fight… the familiars…"

Max looked in shock at the blood on her hands. She hesitated a moment and then she ran. Towards her hell, towards her stolen childhood, towards the cage that had been her home.

*********


	4. Alec Equals Food

**Disclaimer**

**Part 4**

"Well, fancy meeting **you here!" Alec exclaimed sarcastically.**

She ignored him, concentrating instead on her fingers that flew professionally over the keys, a thousand miles a minute. The alarm screamed and droned in their sensitive ears but neither acknowledged it.

Alec could smell the smoke and he could taste its suffocating stench on his tongue as he watched rooms explode in balls of fire. Transgenics ran down the flaming hallways bursting outside only to run for their lives avoiding bullets.

Alec had been planning to do just that but his escaping had led him past the control room and he'd spotted her inside. At first he hadn't known what she'd been doing but then he'd added two plus two and gotten four.

"Max! We have to get out of here!" Alec yelled trying to pull her away, "The building's going to collapse!"

"No way. I have to send the signal otherwise setting them free is no use. If I'm the hero, I'm not gonna be half-assed about it!" she bit back. Alec watched her anxiously, she typed the last command and smashed the system to stop anyone overriding it and in a flash they were out, running at full transgenic speed for the perimeter fence.

452 didn't slow down or stop till she reached the HUV and Alec had barely enough time to register the three people dead on the ground before she shoved inside with little care for his well being. Digging her foot down onto the accelerator the car burst into life and took off towards Seattle.

*******

Alec watched the HUV sink underneath the water and disappear in its depths. The other stood beside him holding a duffel bag and a silver suitcase, and the name Renfro printed on it didn't escape his searching eyes.

Only then did he turn and look at her. Soot and smoke blackened her cammies and face. Ash clung to her hair torn clothes. He studied her physiognomy. It was amazing how much she looked like Sam. Even now he had to smother the guilt and self-destructive thoughts that clouded his mind, the tears that threatened to sting his eyes.

The mocha color of her skin and the dark brown chocolate hair, though Sam's had been curly, was mirrored. Her small nose and full bee-stung lips copied those of his sister to unjust perfection.

"Thanks for the ride I guess," Alec croaked uncomfortably.

She nodded and turned away walking off without even one backward glance to the man that seemed to take up her every thought. The man who only aroused more questions with every answer. 

******

"AAAAAHHH! Oh MY GOD! SKEEEEEETCHY!" The piercing scream cut through Alec's dream filled mind and was murder to his oversensitive ears. He clamped his hands to his head in a sad attempt at blocking out the horrible high-pitched noise.

The previous night he'd been so exhausted he hadn't had the strength to wake OC or Sketch and had decided to collapse on the couch, in a rather ungraceful heap for an X5. That's how he'd been when a half asleep Cindy had come into the living room for breakfast to find him sprawled on the piece of furniture.

To see someone you thought was dead at 8 o'clock in the morning while you're still half-conscious had to be traumatizing but that didn't mean he had to share in the experience.

"Jesus woman can't you see I'm trying to sleep here," mumbled Alec not even opening his eyes but burying his head in the pillows to block out the noise that was still ringing in his ears.

"You're alive! Alec I can't believe you're alive!" yelled an overexcited Cindy jumping on top of the aching X5 and hugging him close despite his protests, "Cindy I love you too but at this rate if you don't stop squeezing I won't be alive."

Sketchy who had awoken to all the noise, half walked, half fell into the room. He spotted a suffocating Alec in OC's arms and snapped out of his fogginess running over to hug his friend. 

Only when Alec began turning blue did the two let him go. He opened his mouth to speak but the sound of an opening door cut him off.

His mouth fell open and his eyes widened at the person who walked in, she walked over to the kitchen and opened the fridge sticking her head inside, "So you got anything good to eat. My place is cleaned out."

Her head resurfaced from the fridge with a smile as she took the plate in her hands over to the counter and took off the plastic wrap; "Oh this looks promising."

Before her fork could dig into the roast Alec had jumped to his feet, blurred the five or so meters to get to her and his hand shot out stopping it a few centimeters from its destination.

"What are you doing here? How did you know where I lived? Did you follow me?" he said his voice rising with each question. 452 looked over his shoulder to an amused and very curious black woman next to a gawking half mussed man who was unabashedly eyeing her chest.

452 grinned, "Your friend is a real ladies' man. What's with the twenty questions? All I want is some food, which you have. What is the problem?" she continued removing his hand from her wrist where it gripped her.

"I said did you follow me?" Alec asked not sure whether he should feel angered or flattered.

"Yeah like a lovesick puppy," Max drawled sarcastically, "Listen pretty boy. Don't flatter yourself. I was out looking for an apartment on the sweetest ride, recently acquired by me, and I could smell you from down the block. I thought to myself, Alec plus house, plus roommates, equals full fridge, equals food. 452 plus motel, equals fridge full of miniscule bottles of liquor and sodas. Not a good breakfast."

Original Cindy couldn't muffle her laughter at Max's words, finally understanding where she had most likely come from, "So how'd you meet Original Cindy's boy suga?"

"You two together? Huh . . . could've sworn you played for the other team OC," 452 herself was surprised at how easily she had picked up the slang. She still remembered it from her first mission and yesterday she'd refreshed her mind by going to that bike race.

"I like her Alec. Wherever did you find her, you'll have to tell me later," she said chuckling and with one hand closed Sketchy's open mouth, "Go get ready for work fool. Alec she's right. You need a shower but I want the full story."

********


	5. Regretted Words

**Disclaimer**

**Part 5**

Alec rode in silence next to Original Cindy. He knew she was watching him, he could feel her gaze on the side of his head; it was almost painful. He knew she knew something was wrong. What was he saying? Nothing was wrong. Nope life was absolutely fucking great He stole a glance in her direction but quickly turned away. 

Once again his eyes returned to the pavement in front of him, occasionally traveling to Sketchy doing tricks on his bike a couple dozen meters in front of them as they rode to work.

"So . . . you gonna tell me what's botherin' ya or are you making me figure it out?" she didn't even wait for a response and continued, "Why ain't you over at Asha making hot monkey love to the gurl?"

He'd expected something along those lines but those particular words surprised him and only his superhuman reflexes saved him from an embarrassing fall. His chuckle was dry and hoarse and Original Cindy didn't miss the hurt flicker in his eyes, "I told you OC, Asha and I are just friends and . . . "

Determined to get her point across OC cut in, "So you're tellin' OC that you ain't completely gutted at having gone there the minute you got into town only to find her curled up in someone else's arms. You're saying that that's not eating at ya?"

Alec's knuckles tightened on the handlebars till they were white and his nostrils flared imperceptibly to anyone else but the woman beside him.

"Now you've told Cindy the story, about everything that happened back at the place you once called home but why not dis? You my boy you know dat. She cried for you . . . couldn't get her to stop for days. She's denying your death to herself with this. She's pretending that nothin' happened . . . I hope to god your new friend isn't there when you and Asha see each other."

Max had left that morning saying something about a friend of hers she had to find and a job. Cindy had invited her that night to Crash but the transgenic hadn't been clear on her presence. Alec figured she'd show up, just cause fate seemed to hate him. Facing his guilt about Sam was hard enough; having someone around with her face was torture.

"What I'm sayin' is that there used to be a chance for you and Blondie before this whole dealio but after meeting your new friend OC ain't so sure," she said parking her bike and walking inside JamPony Alec quickly on her heel, "And what is that . . . "

The X5 was interrupted by the sudden silence that fell. Everyone inside had stopped talking stopped moving. Normal's clipboard clanged as it hit the cement floor and his jaw dropped similarly, "Alec?"

********

"You know you're my boy and all but you have got to tell me how Normal can be so hung over you that you didn't even have to ask for your job back. And he gives you, genetic amped up and all, the packages not even a 5 minute ride from JamPony while Original Cindy gets stuck with hauling her ass all over town," she argued and Alec grinned shaking his head at her exaggerations.

He didn't reply but his gaze once again scanned the bar finding all the usual patrons except the one he was looking for. With a heartfelt sigh his back slouched back into the chair and his usual grin set in noticing all the girls eyeing him.

Sketchy returned with the pitcher of beer and immediately poured Alec, OC and himself a glass, "So when's that hot looking babe from this morning gonna show up? OC you told her 10 o'clock right?"

She grinned and rolled her eyes, "Would the both of ya calm down? You're giving Cindy a migraine. I'm sure she'll show up!" Alec shot up at her words as if he'd been bitten and shot back defensively, "Two of us? I'm not worried whether she's here or not!"

"Mhmmm," Cindy mused taking a generous sip of her beer, "That's why every 5 seconds you scan the bar looking for that hot lickety boo," she said matter of factually raising her eyebrows for emphasis.

"I do NOT like MAX! In fact I can't even stand her. She's a self-centered, sarcastic bitch that represents everything I've always hated about Manticore!" he defended loudly.

"I love you too Alec," came the singsong sugar coated reply from behind him. His face turned to one of horror and he spun around in his chair to look at her. Her face betrayed no emotion in the classic Manticore mask.

"Max I…." He stuttered not knowing what to say but she held up her hands in a motion to stop him, "It's alright. I'm intruding and I know when I'm not wanted. Besides you'll do much better with that blonde staring at you with her mouth open. Someone should tell her that the only thing she'll achieve like that is attracting flies."

Alec looked in the direction she'd pointed only to find his gaze locked with the blonde Max had been talking about. His heart missed a beat for a second and he swallowed. Him and Asha were both frozen, staring disbelieving at each other. He tore his gaze away to where Max had been only to find it empty. His eyes trailed a path to the exit and saw her leaving, some guy's arm wrapped securely around her.

*********


	6. Life Isn't Fair

**Disclaimer**

**Part 6**

Asha's mouth closed shut and a hissed gasp escaped her lips. Her eyes were still wide and she was trying to restart her heartbeat. Alec's gaze tore away from hers to the exit of Crash and she watched him watch the brunette leave.

Tears of joy and jealousy and anger welled up as he stood and hugging OC he left. She sprung up from her chair and ran after him. The cold air hit her, goose bumps forming wherever the chilly night touched her naked skin.

She finally caught sight of him walking towards his apartment and she ran after him catching up, "Alec? . . ." her voice was broken with the restrained tears and hoarse with insecurity.

She noticed his back tense and his jaw clench. When he turned and looked at her she threw herself in his arms hugging him to her and a choked sob was muffled by his jacket. Back straight and rigid, he didn't respond to her embrace instead he pushed her back and stared at her waiting. She looked up at him slightly scared at the look he wore. It was the same expression she'd seen him wear after Sam had died, the one he'd had after the South Africans.

It was cold, detached and unreachable. She unconsciously shivered, "Alec? Why didn't you tell me you were alive? I . . . I can't believe it's really you," she whispered.

The chuckle his lips released wasn't the happy, carefree one she'd always heard and the grin that spread upon his lips wasn't the cocky arrogant one she was used to, "Oh I had planned to. In fact I went straight to your place the minute I got into Seattle. Guess you were busy," he scoffed.

"I don't understand. I was home all of last night with . . ." Asha trailed off as it struck her. Her eyes fell to the pavement ashamed to look at him and see the hurt in his expression.

"That's right. You were with your Captain America and S1W leader of which I already forgot the name. Was he a good fuck huh Asha? Did he rock your world? HUH?" he screamed watching her flinch at his harsh words. He hadn't meant to go that far but he was hurt and he was lashing out.

"That's not fair," she muttered almost inaudibly.

"Well life isn't fair Asha. If it were I wouldn't have been born in Manticore. I wouldn't have been recaptured and when I finally escaped I wouldn't have found you in that asshole's arms. Am I that easy to forget? You waited how long before making somebody's night? After that Logan guy died last year in that shooting you wouldn't talk to me for days. You would only cry and not eat or move. Did you even shed a tear for me Asha?" his voice was broken and the pain he was feeling could be felt in his every word.

"Of course I cried for you! You mean the world to . . ." he cut her off angry, "I don't even want to hear your excuses right now. Call me in a few weeks. Maybe I'll be calm enough to talk rationally and we can go back to being what we were, 'friends' but Asha?" he said bitterly.

Her eyes met his and saw betrayal; "I seriously doubt it."

*********

Surrounded in the darkness the wind bit at his clothes and skin. He could see all the tiny insignificant lights of Seattle from up here and he let his thoughts untangle with the calmness his High place brought.

The bourbon bottle weighed in his hand; a firm reminder that he was still alive, still kicking to stay on the surface of the dark waters that threatened to swallow him into their depths the same way they had done to Sam. He took another long swig letting the liquid burn incandescently down his throat to settle in his stomach. 

"Love sucks but alcohol isn't the answer. You can't get drunk before going broke considering your JamPony salary. But then again you're an X5, that usually states you have another source of income," the one familiar voice he didn't want right then spoke.

"What would you know about love?" he snorted shaking his head.

For a moment there was silence and Alec strained his ears to make sure she was still there. A small scoffed chuckle confirmed her presence, "A lot more than you think."

******** 


	7. A Lot You Don't Know

**Disclaimer**

**A/N: This chapter was to show Alec that what he sees isn't necessarily the truth which will be key in later chapters. And I hope you guys liked Mole too. I loved writing him even if he was a little out of character.**

**Part 7**

Her words lingered in his mind and for a second he thought he might have gone too far. A low sigh escaped his lips as he searched for something to say.

Coming up empty he raised the bourbon to his lips and downed the remaining amber liquid satisfied at the numbness it brought. The door to the stairs closing brought him crashing back to earth and he went after her. 

At the base of the Needle he watched her straddle a black-chrome Ninja driving off into the night and jumping on his own bike he went after her determined to find out where she was going. He rationalized it in his own mind as quid pro quo. She knew where he lived. It was only fair that the knowledge was reciprocated.

She zigzagged expertly through traffic and even he was finding it difficult to keep up without losing track of her but staying far enough to not alert her of his following. He used all of his Manticore training as he sped after her through the busy Seattle streets, now more curious than ever on her destination. Asha momentarily completely forgotten.

He couldn't help but be puzzled when she stopped outside Terminal City. Ditching his bike he followed her in, careful to not make his presence known. She walked with a grace about her he hadn't ever noticed before; it was delicate and feminine yet held strength and power in its stride.

With a quick check over his shoulder he turned back round ready to follow her when a pair of small yet remarkably strong hands gripped him and threw him into a concrete wall.

He felt the all too familiar pressure of a forearm digging into his throat cutting off his air supply and he gasped in surprise trying to draw in his denied air. 

"Alec what the fuck are you doing following me?" the irritated voice snapped.

Max released him when his head began turning a worrisome shade of purple and Alec took greedy gulping breaths, "You followed me first," he shot back once his breath had returned to a more normal state. His hand massaged his jugular defensively and he frowned at her expression.

"Oh that's real mature!" she exclaimed pivoting on her heel and walking away from him. She seemed to be doing that a lot he noted.

"Would you stop leaving in the middle of a conversation?" he said annoyed and re-adjusting his clothes to a presentable state.

"Would you stop following me?" she shot back not even looking at him.

"Can you stop answering my questions with questions? And you seemed fine to follow me so I returned the favor," he deadpanned and flicked a piece of imaginary fluff off his jacket.

Max rolled her eyes, "For the last fucking time. I DID NOT follow you. I heard your roommates screaming and I thought I'd drop in," she shrugged innocently and pushed a door open.

Following her inside he kept his attention on her not even noticing that they now had an audience, "For an X5 that has spent the whole of her life in a government facility saying yes sir's you sure do swear a lot," he pointed out.

Alec jumped in surprise when a decidedly male gruff voice answered and spinning round he came to face with what could only be described as a human lizard, "It's called freedom of speech."

******

"Otto I want to know what happened and I want to know it now. Thousands of mutant freaks escaping was not in the original plan and I want to know who the hell played this message! You understand?" he yelled throwing documents and files to the ground in his anger.

The operative nodded a quick 'yes sir' and quickly left his superior's office. The man inside paced back and forth. His face was marred in a permanent frown and he scowled angrily. 

Whoever projected that message to all those freaks was going to have hell to pay when he found them.

*****

Alec stared unblinkingly at the anomaly in front of him. He swallowed hoarsely and regained his composure but still never letting his sight deviate from its current subject.

"This another of your boyfriend's? I mean, sure I know you want to bring them home to meet the parents but what is this? The third since last night?"

Max grinned and hugged the 'lizard guy' who didn't return the gesture but didn't deny it either, simply choosing to stand, "What can I say, they just keep following me home mum. I can't just leave 'em out there to starve!"

"Someday you'll have to explain to me how Mole let's you close enough to touch him let alone hug him," A pale misshapen man asked from a computer chair.

"Dix, jealous?" said a third voice and Alec didn't know where to look any more. At the moment he was surrounded, by what as a kid he'd feared more than life itself, what Sam's stories had been based on to scare them; nomlies. Seeing her clone hug one was slightly… screwed for lack of a better word.

452 laughed both at Joshua's comment and Alec's complete lack of knowledge on what to do on the situation, "Your boy sure ain't much of a talker."

Alec turned and almost hugged the person he found himself facing. She must have been another X5, her figure was identical to Max's but her eyes were blue and her hair was chestnut brown and straight, falling some below her shoulders.

"I guess he ain't one for new faces," Max suggested greeting the other X5, "That just hurts Maxie poo!"

452 glared at Mole and he grinned with false innocence.

********

She watched her sister intently work at her motorcycle. Her face had slight grease smudges and her hands were nearly completely black. But the transgenic barely noticed working away tightening this and that and adjusting here and there.

452 looked over to find Jondy's face contorted in disgust and she rolled her eyes, "It's just grease. Get over it."

The X5's face only screwed up more and she emphasized with her tongue and a decidedly 'bleah' face, "It's disgusting. It gets all stuck in you nails and it smells," she defended, "Why didn't you just use gloves?"

"Oh no Jondy!" she exclaimed with pretend shock and wiped her hands on the side of her jeans, "I'm a genetically engineered soldier bread from birth to kill efficiently and happily! I couldn't possibly get a little motor oil on my hands! I might break a nail. And would you look at that. My jeans! They're all dirty!" she said mockingly and pretending she was about to cry.

Max grinned watching her sister's face seethe and smoke begin to spout from both her ears. Everyone else in the room, that had been previously occupied with other things, unconsciously gave them more room.

******

Max and Alec sat side by side on the curb outside his apartment. Neither moved or said anything as neither knew what to say or do.

It was Alec who broke the silence first. His face turned to face hers but she still looked up straight ahead to the top of the Needle much like he did when he was deep in thought. She still had a slight grin on her face from her victory and the smile reached her eyes highlighting them with life and the will to be alive.

"I've never seen anyone fight like that," he admitted and she turned at the sincerity of his voice, "Don't get me wrong I could hand anybody their ass but I guess I missed a few tricks from the second decade."

She smiled and rolled her eyes before her face turned once again somber, "Yeah, well there's a lot you don't know about me. People who don't know shouldn't make assumptions."

She stood again and brushed the dust off the seat of her pants, "I better get going."

"Will I see you again?" he said a bit too hoping.

"Well. A few hours ago you said, and I quote 'I do NOT like MAX! In fact I can't even stand her. She's a self-centered, sarcastic bitch that represents everything I've always hated about Manticore' but now . . . I dunno, something's changed," she grinned cockily, "Yeah. You haven't gotten rid of me."

*******


	8. Talking Isn't Helping

**Disclaimer**

**Part 8**

A few nights later

Jondy stood deadly straight, her eyes scanning from left to right and right to left in a never-ending pattern. She'd always been good at look out. Her vision had always served her well; it didn't matter whether it was day or night like it was now.

She tapped her comm. lightly and she heard her sister's exasperated sigh, "What is it now Jondy?"

"Your boyfriend seems nice," Jondy could practically see the fire dance in her sister's eyes and her nostrils flare imperceptibly with anger, "He is NOT my boyfriend."

Jondy's muttered 'my ass' only fuelled Max's anger even more and she closed her eyes counting to ten before re opening them and continuing to unscrew the glass dome around the baseball. Why her fence was willing to pay her 75 grand for a little ball she had no idea but who was she to question?

"So what's he like?" Jondy said innocently as she studied her nails with pride. Being lookout had its perks. She didn't have to break nails with this job.

"What, what's he like?" Max said under her breath lifting the protective glass and placing it alongside making sure to make no sound. Carefully she lifted the baseball and placed it in the little pouch that was strapped to her cat suit.

"Well in bed! I thought that was obvious. You were breeding partners right?!" 

452 nearly dropped the glass partition in her shock and Jondy didn't miss the slight growl, "Hey I'm just making small talk," she defended; back pedaling for all she was worth. Sometimes she crossed a few too many lines with her sister, pushing her a little too far and it wasn't healthy.

"Would you please do me the favor of dropping the topic of conversation!" she hissed screwing the bolts back into place one by one, "Besides even if I was interested. Which I'm not! I wouldn't even do anything. I'm not one for commitment when it comes to these things."

Jondy's previous good humor turned a stalemate and she sighed waiting for her sister to climb back up the rope and onto the ceiling. Stretching out a hand she pulled her up through the skylight and they closed the window once again.

As they made their way to the edge of the roof to jump down and head back to Terminal City Jondy wrapped an arm around Max and asked, "Why do you keep beating yourself up about Brendan? It wasn't your fault Max."

Jondy barely heard the whispered reply, "For the same reasons I still refer to myself as 452."

********

Otto stood hesitantly outside the office. Scrounging up the little courage he had left when it came to facing his boss he knocked and entered closing the door at the replied 'come in'.

"What is it?" the man asked him. The operative cleared his throat and answered quickly, "Sir, we may have found who played that message."

Otto handed the other a black and white screenshot of Max in the control room.

He grinned menacingly and trailed a finger over the face in the photograph, "Excellent work Otto. Post someone you trust to continue the normal search for transgenics, I want you full time on finding this girl. She could be the key to all the transgenics."

"Yes sir, White sir," Otto replied and left the office.

**********

Jondy jumped off the back of the bike and Max followed taking the keys. The briefcase she carried would have been heavy for an ordinary girl but 452 carried it with ease. 

"Hey Max!" the two girls turned and Jondy smiled at the eager face of Apion.

They slowed waiting for him to catch up and he fell in step beside Max, "How did the heist go? Everything go smoothly?"

Max grinned at the X6, "Course it went fine. You don't think I can handle it?" her tone changed and she feigned anger.

"Oh no ma'am! Not at all, I was just . . . " he stuttered berating himself inwardly, "Relax kid I was just playing. As you can see, it went fine. That ought to keep us in beer and skittles for a few weeks," she mused holding up the briefcase, which he took.

"Good cause we have a whole lot of new people. Transhuman, anomalies, X5's, X6's and even a few seven's and eight's," Apion nodded acknowledging another X6 from his unit, "This place is turning into grand central."

"We're gonna need more fuel for the generators, blankets, medical supplies ASAP and I'm gonna need more cigars," croaked Mole causing Apion and Jondy to start in surprise. 452 didn't so much as bat an eyelid, "You gotta stop sneaking up on people Mole, you scare the children."

Max grinned at her sister's glare and she ruffled Apion's hair signaling them to follow, "Could you take the money down to Fist? He'll know what to do with it. And then I'm gonna need you to round up half a dozen X6's you trust. I'll meet you at my place in ten."

Jondy raised an eyebrow but said nothing else and Max waved off their questioning glances, "Dix?"

Transfixed on something no doubt very interesting on his computer screen it took a second for the anomaly to realize someone had called his name, "Oh sorry. Can I help with something oh great commander?" he said with a grin.

Max rolled her eyes and returned the smile, "Any word on our friend looking to kill us? Have you figured out who he is?"

Dix shook his head, "No, we still haven't got a good enough picture of him but we know he's an NSA agent but he also works with the FBI and other such agencies. I'm going through their databases seeing if I can find the same guy in all of them. Then we'll have a visual."

Max nodded and he smiled proud of his work.

"Mole make a list of everything we need most urgently and I'm gonna need someone to start an infirmary. Jondy can you help Luke find someone?" her sister nodded and Max smiled before pivoting on her heel and leaving headquarters. She had a few minutes before having to meet Apion, she figured there was nowhere else better to spend it then at Camus.

********

A few sectors away, looking out through the recently cleaned window of the apartment Alec watched the city in thoughtfulness. 

"You so spun over that lickety boo boy that your head's gonna fly off," Cindy mumbled underneath her breath. Her words shattered his dreamland and he fell back to earth.

"I most certainly am not!" he defended testily.

"Mhmmm," Alec bristled at her noncommittal grunt, "And what is that supposed to mean?" he asked raising his voice.

Original Cindy put a hand on her hip and she shook her other finger vigorously in front of his face. She looked up at him threateningly, "Don't you use that tone with OC! There's enough smack-downs to go around and Original Cindy is most certainly not afraid of you boy! 

Alec grinned quieted and smiled innocently, "Now listen here boo cause I'm only gonna say this once," Cindy ignored his snorted response and continued, "Now when I first met your scrawny ass you tried to get Original Cindy under the sheets wit ya. And I told ya no, straight up, but you kept coming back. You had it easy with the women and you still do, then comes Asha into the picture and suddenly, Boom! No more ladies for my boy. Then you return from that hell ready to take the step and she gone off wit another man!"

Alec flinched at her last sentence and looked away but OC took his chin in her hands and made him look at her, "And that hurt ya boo. A lot. But now you got yourself a chica. She keeps your mind off of things and I know why you in denial. She looks like ya sister boo but she ain't. She's somethin' completely different and she's good for ya boo! Listen, OC knows what she's ranting about."

Alec smiled and his eyes glinted with an ineligible emotion before it was gone, "Alright OC. Whatever you say."

His eyes returned to the window glazing over in thought as he dove once again into the corners of his mind. Cindy sighed and with a final touch to his cheek in the last attempt to make him understand she left, leaving him to his thoughts. 

"She's something alright," he muttered to the empty room.

********

452's feet made no noise as she walked down the deserted hallway towards her apartment. She could here the rhythmic breathing of four people inside and the quiet talking. Either she was the best or Manticore hadn't been very strict on X6's.

Opening the door she walked inside and the four immediately stood to attention. Gesturing for them to sit down she shrugged out of her jacket tossing it behind her not even turning to see if it landed on the hook behind the door but trusting her actions enough to know where it landed.

Apion sat comfortably on her bed while the other three not as daring remained on her beat out couch. Raising an eyebrow Apion straightened and sat up a little, "Comfortable?"

The younger boy grinned and shrugged, "It'll do."

Her stance was powerful and authoritative yet she carried herself with grace and femininity. Silently she studied the four teenagers in her apartment.

Apion had a slight grin on his face awaiting her orders. Blue eyes awaited patiently as she let her eyes trail his features. His skin looked sun-kissed and tan and his very short hair was golden blonde, sticking up in curls. His jaw was set and she smothered the urge to roll her eyes at his toothy grin that hinted teeth sharper than the normal human.

Turning to the other three her gaze encountered that of a darker boy. They were all aged around 15 to 17 but he looked to be the oldest next to Apion. His features were sharp and his gaze calculating. He didn't betray his nervousness at her study but she'd spent enough time with people to simply be able to sense it.

"What's your name?" her voice though ordering was remarkably soft and the boy didn't hesitate, "Obsidian ma'am. But I'm referred to as Sid."

She nodded in acknowledgement and she could understand the reason for his name. His hair, short and straight, was coal black as were his eyes and his skin was deep chocolate hue, "What are your names?"

The two girls were most obviously completely different. One was short but slender and she looked anything but deadly. Her hair was blonde and tied back into a messy ponytail similar to Ralph's. That kid's a mess. How she survived field med. is beyond me she mused.

The other was of darker skin much like hers and her hair was chestnut brown that she kept in a boy's cut. 

"Caiman ma'am," the darker one replied and the blonde soon after, "Ese."

Max raised an eyebrow, "You can call me Max," she paused before continuing, "you named yourselves 'Alligator' and 'That one' in Spanish?"

The two girls looked at each other and back to her. She shrugged apologetically, "Hey, whatever floats your boat."

*******


	9. Avoidance, In More Ways Than One

**Disclaimer**

**Part 9**

Two weeks later

"Sir? We may have found our key to the girl," explained Otto ignoring his sweating palms.

The agent handed a photograph of Alec to White and proceeded to explain at his boss' questioning look, "He was seen in the control room with the girl sir. He's another X5, designation 494. He's one of the '09 escapees. From previous information we managed to download off of Manticore's database before it burnt we knew his location to be Seattle, sector 5 but that is how detailed we were able to locate him."

White smiled dangerously and rasped looking at the nervous operative, "And what makes you think he returned there and that he'll know where the girl is?"

"Well sir, using the police database we found evidence of a hummer with the registration of Elizabeth Renfro's car passing through two sector check points ending in Sector 9. It's likely it was sunk. Ms Renfro had planned to leave with the girl the same night of Manticore's burning," Agent Otto finished suppressing the urge to flinch waiting for his superior's words.

"Excellent work Otto. You've earned yourself this weeks paycheck," answered White.

If this girl was linked to all the transgenics this would be over in less than a week, "Maybe I'll play a round of golf on Sunday."

*********

The music was loud and thumping as he let it wash over him calming his nerves. He swiveled the glass in his hand letting a small smile coy his lips as the amber concoction swished against the glass walls that trapped it, shimmering a million colors.

Alec figured that when someone began associating himself with a Jack Daniel's that person had to be on the fast track to a mental institution. Amusing himself with his thoughts he brought it to his lips letting the burning liquid sear a path down his throat to settle in his stomach and he welcomed the tiny buzz it gave him.

Sitting at home had only made him think about OC's words and they'd been the last think he wanted to grovel on. In fact at the moment he didn't even want to be able of conscious thought. Thinking meant thinking about her and Alec didn't want that. That's why he was there in the first place, to sit in half darkness, watch the girls and ignore his problems.

'I don't like her. Not at all.' he told himself even as a second voice in his head chanted 'In denial.' over and over; it was OC's voice and Alec chuckled at the idea that she was in charge of his inner conscious.

Despite his thoughts he couldn't stop the image that built inside his mind of her from passing past his eyes. _He was entranced at the large smile across her full bee stung lips as she entered the club. Immediately every male eye in the place drew to her but she seemed oblivious and unperturbed at the glares from every other female._ He shook his head attempting to clear the hallucinations he saw of her, of what he'd seen happen repeatedly for the past two weeks.

_The tight sand-colored pants she wore resided low on her hips, almost too low and the plain blue top she had didn't quite reach the waistband, showing golden silk skin as she carved a path through the crowded room over to the bar. Spellbound by her, his gaze never wavered. He watched, jealousy growing as men swarmed to her like drones to a queen bee. Anger claimed him seeping into his mind as he watched her play along with the flirting, laugh at their jokes that he had no doubt were horrible toilet humor._

He scowled at the images, sinking farther and further into his seat, as he pictured her simpering and flirting, manipulating the men to her advantage. Laughing and drinking and soaking up all the attention and he couldn't help the childish urge to mimic her fake giggle.

******

No words were uttered. No grin, no raised eyebrows, no flirting or teasing. Normal looked worriedly as his Golden Boy sat on one of the benches he provided for the useless bums that worked for him.

He watched as the younger man fitted with precision the dozen packages into his bag. Not that he was complaining, it was about time someone worked hard, but even he had grown concern for Alec's all of a sudden work ethic.

With a small nod in his boss' direction Alec straddled his bike and rode onto the streets of Seattle. Two weeks. It had seemed like a life time but in fact had been no more than fourteen days since she'd last so much as spoken a word to him that wasn't a hey or a hi. And even as he bristled at this fact he scowled asking himself why he even cared.

Why did he want to see the face of his serial killer sister traipsing around? The sister that he had killed to save himself. And yet, he wanted to see her, talk to her, touch her . . . Alec shook his head at the trail of his thoughts and gripped the handlebars tighter. 

She was just a transgenic. That's why he wanted her company, no her presence. Because he needed someone else like him around. Happy with his conclusion over his controversy feeling he smiled a tight smile ignoring the voice that screamed in his mind that had grown anything but smaller over time.

*******

The sheets were rumpled and torn, shredded in the shape of fingernails. In the middle lay a sweat soaked body curled in the fetal position clutching the covers to her shaking form. 452 didn't sleep, never had much. Max didn't sleep much either, plagued from dreams, nightmares that were no more than unchangeable memories of the past.

Her brow was crinkled in terror and grief as the dreams once again took over.

_She looked down at her hands and her chest and realized she was 6 all over again. Her head rose hesitantly knowing already what she'd see._

_Her fists were clenched and she controlled her breathing. _

_Jack._

_He laid dead, cold to the touch on the metal surface of the operating table. The doctors stood over him with metal tools and blades that shone blinding light into their eyes. The frightened members of her unit stood in a circle around the table, watching their fellow soldier be opened and tested on as if he were no more than a lab rat._

_With a silent shudder she realized they ***were*** no more than lab rats. Her young confused eyes sought those of their colonel, the person that held their life in his hands._

_In a sense he'd been their god, the one with imminent power. She schooled her features and blocked the sight in front of her refusing to see it. This would make them strong he'd said. It would make them wiser._

_She refused to show weakness, just like she'd done back then._

_The room was painted a blinding white and she found herself growing dizzy as everything spun and blurred together and she clinched her eyes close trying to focus._

_She could hear whispers and screams like those from the basement, getting louder and louder and her hands flew to her ears blocking the sound trying to stop it._

_Her eyes darted open and she found herself in the barracks._

_She shot up from her cot and her heart began pounding. Palpitating so hard in her chest she could feel it in her throat. She was 9 and they were coming. She could hear their pounding feet running down the hallways, coming to get her. She knew that they'd take her, again to that place. The place where you can't sleep or eat or drink and the place where you forget time. Where you forget everything but the blinding white and the obscure darkness. Where the only thing you knew for certain was that you wished you'd never been given life._

_They were closer, almost upon her. The whole barracks were awake, sitting up in their beds, scared looks on their faces. The doors burst open and for only a second her eyes met with Jondy's. A second that felt like a lifetime as everything slowed to a stop. There was no more noise but she could hear music playing, calming._

_She felt the tugs of rough hands grab her, reviving her from her lapse in time and she opened her mouth to scream, no noise escaping. She pulled and writhed at their holds as they dragged her and Ben kicking and screaming._

She shot up in bed with a scream and still felt the touch of hands on her body. In a blur of movement she'd pinned her attacker to her bed the gun that lay under her pillow pressed against Jondy's temple.

With a disgusted gasp she jumped off her sister falling to the ground looking at her hands in horror, "I'm sorry Jon . . . I'm so sorry."

Max watched her sister smile reassuringly and wrap her arms around her and she collapsed against her burying her head in her shoulder but refusing to let the tears fall. Jondy sighed and kept whispering comforting words, knowing that when she was ready the tears would come.

******

He sat on the steps that led inside his apartment building staring at an imaginary dot across the road.

He caught the movement from the corner of his eye but he didn't turn to acknowledge the person. Only when they cleared their throat did he finally turn his face. His eyes met a pair of mischievous blue ones that at the same time were filled with a deep sadness.

He raised an eyebrow at Jondy but she smiled and shook her head, "I wanna talk to you."

Her tone had a sense of full authority and Alec found himself nodding. 

The silence was comfortable yet held that air of anxiousness and he knew that she had something she wanted, needed to say. So he bit his tongue and waited for her to start.

"You like her don't you?" her voice after so long a silence startled him but he successfully resisted the urge to jump. Schooling his features he placed a cocky grin upon his face and faced her, "As much as anyone loves a photocopied painful memory that just so happens to have a big mouth."

Jondy smiled and shrugged turning to face him, "You knew she was different. From when you met her you knew she wasn't like every other lab-rat in that hell she torched."

His face marred in confusion and his eyebrows furrowed he looked for a clue on where she was going with this conversation, "And you liked that," she continued grinning.

"She likes you, you know?" he snorted in response and didn't let her interject, "Yeah, that's why she's hanging off of every word some scumbag is feeding her just to get her into bed. And she'll pick the least nasty and go fuck his brains out. That's why she's been avoiding me for two weeks. Oh yeah Jondy. She REALLY likes me!" he drawled in anger and rolled his eyes.

The other X didn't contradict anything instead she smiled standing up once again, "And you like her too."

Alec watched her turn and head back in the direction from which she'd come, a dumbfounded expression still on his face.

*******

She wasn't avoiding him. Yeah right. Of course she was avoiding him. She sighed once again as she slipped the black top of her cat-suit on and she fastened the zipper on the back. Fastening the laces to her boots she pulled them tightly scratching any possibility that they'd come loose during the mission.

Braiding her hair with fingers fast like those of a ferret she tied the end and adjusted the black beanie on her head. It was an easy in and out thing. Go in, avoid contact of any kind, find office, take files and leave. Easy peasy japanesey. 'Then why am I getting a bad feeling about this one?'

Shaking the troublesome thoughts away she convinced her mind that it was just pre mission jitters, just cold feet. This guy was far from Mr. Bad Guy himself but he wasn't quite normal. And if someone who wanted them dead in a big way was stupid enough to leave a trail then she had every right to follow it and end his existence before he tried to end hers.

Even with the call system they had set up and the monitors each with a different news station it was hard to keep track of her fellow kin. Luke spent hours with his ears to a headset listening for any calls on the Sector cops' communication frequency but the few stragglers still got caught.

Max looked at the briefcase that sat beneath her bed hidden to an extent beneath some spare clothes and then to the still torn sheets on her bed. Shaking her head she cleared her thoughts, all she had to worry about was keeping her family safe.

******


	10. Easy Peasy Japanesy

**Disclaimer**

**A/N: I apologize now to each and every blonde who reads this. I'm sorry.**

**Part 10**

Asha walked day dreamily down the streets, her feet unconsciously taking her through the maze of people and towards Alec's place. So caught in her own thoughts that she didn't even notice the 4 people in suits leaving the front door and she collided into a darker man.

Snapping out of her funk she stared into brown eyes and pale skin. He smiled a smile that looked foreign on his face that held natural frown marks and bent over picking up her wallet that she'd dropped. Asha's heart clinched as a photo of Alec fell out of it and she closed her eyes against the hurt.

Feeling a sharp prick at her side she opened her eyes in surprise just as her legs gave way and she blinked dazedly as she stared into cold brown eyes.

*******

Her eyes were hard, detached as she stepped into headquarters immediately spotting the X6's. Mole looked up from a map he was studying with Dix and immediately looked down again. 

The black pants and boots hugged her legs to perfection much like the turtleneck polo. The beanie held her hair out of her face and the long plat cascaded down her back. Her eyes seemed to be just as stormy and she felt the air around her become tense.

A bitter grin that didn't reach her eyes tugged her lips at the realization that in that moment everyone in that room was scared of her if not downright terrified. Like the panther she resembled and no doubt was in some part she moved gracefully to her team.

"Ready?" her tone was brisk and unmoved, "Get comms off Mole and meet me outside. You already know the lay out, there's no need to go over it again."

Four quick nods greeted her and 452 smiled, "Then let's go."

She turned and walked out but didn't miss the sound of relieved sighs and turning to a just as black Jondy she was met by an amused grin, "You know when you get like this you sometimes even scare the beejesus out of me dear sister."

452 looked at her then allowed herself a quick smile before it was gone, "Jon, you've always been scared of me. You always will be."

"Pffft," and the poking of her tongue was the only answer and the two girls opened the back of the van allowing the younger generation to get in before moving to the front seats.

*******

The building loomed in front of them but the two older transgenics seemed unperturbed. Apion was nervous but like his unit he controlled his reactions and schooled his features.

"You know the plan?"

Five unanimous nods and she acknowledged them, "Beta team to the right, my team we're going left."

She didn't wait to see Jondy take off at full transgenic speed with Ese and Apion knowing by instinct that her sister wouldn't hesitate. She could taste the anxiety that emanated from Caiman and Sid as they blurred in tandem with her, mirroring her every move and sway to a point where outside eyes would think it was a synchronized performance.

Reaching the barbed wire fence she bent her knees crouching that tiny bit lower than most X's did and propelling herself that much higher. Without missing a beat the two copied and sailed over the wire.

"The trick is in the knees," she said calmly standing in a half crouch as she zoomed in on the cameras and the guards.

452 counted down in her mind . . .

_It's easy 452, bend your knees when you jump. Bend them a fraction more and you'll go higher, it's simple physics._

_She looked up at her CO as he showed her how to fold her body, "Remember that you're better than any guard, TAC leader or even the colonel. You can do things they only dream of._

. . . shaking the images from her eyes she twitched her fingers as the last camera turned and she sprinted again, her feet flying over the earth not even making a sliver of sound, knowing exactly where to tread.

Her breath was barely hitched as she reached the guards knocking one out with her own momentum and quickly moving to the second. Her foot sweeping his legs off the ground and smashing her fist into his face breaking his nose and cheekbones and sending him into the land on unconsciousness.  Hearing the third thump to the ground behind her she righted her self from her position, one knee on the ground her clenched hand still near the guys bleeding face. She held up a fist, covered in blood that did not belong to her, in a sign of stopping as she moved to the door. Picking the lock to it she ignored the shock that had quickly shone in their eyes at the strength and precision of the fight and 452 locked the animal inside of her back in its cage.

Sid watched her with Caiman as she scrutinized the hall leading into the warehouse with focus, checking for traps, sensors, anything that might give away the breach. They waited for her signal before moving inside with her. 

452 kept her attention on her surroundings as they stepped into the wide expanse of the warehouse, their bodies hidden by some crates. Her head flicked up looking at the rafters of the roof that hung over them by at least 75 feet.

With intricate gestures she signaled the X6's and they looked in the direction she pointed spotting Ese and Apion and then Jondy below them on the other side of the warehouse. 452 crouched on one knee and nodded to Sid as he sprinted toward her, jumping on her hands she propelled him upwards where she grabbed hold of the support beams, Caiman following straight after.

The four transgenics strategically placed themselves covering the whole expanse of the warehouse; their fingers on the triggers ready to fire.

Jondy's eyes caught Max's and she realized that in this moment she wasn't Max but just 452 and with a painful pang she recognized that she was fighting the memories that were now resurfacing with a vengeance, fighting the animal that every transgenic kept behind a steel locked door.

*******

Her whole body felt numb and tingled. The ground below her was hard and cold and with a painful groan she opened her eyes noting that it was concrete. Moving her hands to wipe her eyes they blocked and she heard the familiar jingle of handcuffs except this time Alec wasn't gonna come in on his big white horse to save her.

"Well good morning sunshine," drawled a naturally raspy voice. 

With difficulty she righted herself in a sitting position and her blurry eyes focused again on brown eyes, "What the hell do you want from me?"

"Oh don't take it personally we don't want you. We're gonna use you as bait for a bigger fish. What can you tell me about him?" eyes widened and her mouth flapped at the photo of Alec placed in front of her, "Now there's a reaction."

*******

452 trailed her sister as they made their way towards the offices getting closer and closer to voices. She smiled as Jondy darted behind cargo effectively letting them reach the office door without being seen or seeing the owners of the voices.

Clicking the door closed behind her she began looking through files on the desk and in the drawers as Jondy copied the hard-drive before deleting it.

Growling in frustration at all the nonsense this guy had on his desk she opened the last drawer. A face-splitting grin spread her lips and lifting the 5 manila folders she handed them to Jondy who placed them inside her cat suit.

'In and out. Easy peasy japanesy' she thought again as they left with everything they'd found leaving the office empty of anything this guy had on them. 'What kind of bad guy is called Ames White? It just screams geek.'

She grinned at her thoughts and signaled to Apion who led the X6's out through the roof. Breathing a sigh of relief she relaxed a little, not even a hiccup, but the feeling of doom, the familiar feeling that everything was about to screw itself over not leaving her. Just about to exit through the doors she heard a voice she hadn't planned on hearing, "What the hell do you want with me?"

"Oh shit," Jondy stopped at her sister's curse. Max had her eyes closed as she battled with her conscience before letting out a low ground out growl of frustration; her jaw clenched and her eyes opening to reveal a storm, "Fucking blondes!"

*******


	11. The Animal Inside

**Disclaimer**

**Part 11******

Jondy was sure that she must have looked like a complete idiot. Her mouth was frozen half open and her eyes as wide as saucers, babbling to find something to say as she watched the darker girl speak to Apion through the comm. "Apion get them back to the van."

She barely heard the confirmation, "Yes ma'am."

"Good. I'm sending out Jondy. If I'm not out in ten go without me," she lashed out snatching the earpiece away, her chest heaving, "What are you doing?"

They caught gazes, blue meeting brown, time slowing down like it always had. The persistent voice of Apion broke them from the trance and she handed the ear-piece back, "Ma'am . . . ma'am are you there? Did I hear you right? Can you hear me?"

"If me and Max aren't out in ten minutes leave without us," Jondy explained and broke contact, "You ain't doing this alone."

******

The air was tense in TC. Alec could feel the fear and anxiety wash over him the second he stepped past the broken wire fence. His eyes shot left and right as if searching for some invisible monster as he walked into headquarters.

His suped up reflexes were the only thing that allowed him to jump out of the way as a fuming Mole rushed past.

He watched the lizard man burst up the stairs, his jaw clenched so hard on his cigar that Alec watched as it broke in two and fell to the metal grate floor. Transgenics were running around like mad as Mole yelled and ordered them around, the pale misshapen transgenic, he'd seen the last time he'd been here, was furiously bringing up windows and typing onto the numerous computers as if his life depended on it.

A quick glance to the green transhuman on a warpath and that possibility didn't seem so ridiculous.

He strode towards the higher balcony, avoiding as many people as he could, not quite sure himself on what he was going to do.

"Mole? What's happening?" the nomlie looked up in a rage and Alec suppressed the urge to back away, "I'll tell you what is fucking happening. That idiot of your breeding partner just decided to go save a fucking ordinary!"

"And what's wrong with that?" he asked confused.

He glanced around quickly when the whole room just halted staring at him. His eyes returned to the stormy red eyes of the lizard, "Oh I suppose you think it's very noble of her don't you? That it was the right thing to do?"

The soft tone Mole spoke with was mocking and jeering but when Alec opened his mouth to speak the transhuman yelled with rage looking down on him nose to nose, "Well I have news for you pretty boy, it isn't. An ordinary doesn't and will never be worth risking a transgenic for. NEVER!"

Alec felt his anger growing and he spit back, "See that's why we're being hunted down in the streets. Because people always think that they're better and they're the ones that need to survive. We're the same as them, we're just as human, we make the same mistakes and have the same successes!"

"We aren't like them and we never will be! Open your freaking eyes and look around! All they see is a pack of monsters that are out to get them! You've been out in this world too long for your own good and I can't speak for everyone here but the last thing I want to be is an ordinary. They think they're life is bad cause they're poor. But they can't understand, YOU can't understand. You think life at Manticore was bad when you were ten, a little brainwashing, a few maneuvers outside?!" the lizard boomed.

"Well it sucked pretty hard yeah!" Alec retorted his anger rising with each of Mole's words.

He smiled bitterly, "Well take it from us, later on it got a whole lot worse. Ask anyone here who's been through it. You think you're a god cause you had the guts to leave well let me fill in the blanks, the ones who had the guts were the ones who stayed. The ones who got punished for each one of the mistakes you little rug-rats made. Ask any X5 that was brainwashed, simplified and tortured to see if they'd turn like you, your old unit members that didn't make it, heck ask the clones! You were living the life and meanwhile us . . . we were living the punishments, choking on the tightened leashes."

Alec refused the urge to cower but the guilt seeped into his eyes for a flash of a second, "Why don't you ask Max about her life?! About how it felt in psy-ops at age 7 and at age 9 and at 16 and at age 19. Ask her how it felt to be TORTURED, to be TESTED, to lose your own sanity locked inside a metal box. To be poked and prodded by doctors for so long that you're not sure if it's day or night or Monday or Thursday of March or May! SHE'S NOT WORTH LOSING OVER SOME STUPID DUMB FUCKING ORDINARY! Maybe to you but not to me."

*******

"Oh no way we aren't doing that," Jondy began shaking her head violently speaking loudly enough to give their position away, intentionally of course, as they came out from behind their hiding place, "Do you have a death wish?" she hissed.

"The dumbest plan has always worked for us. Remember Beijing?" she scoffed back, "Besides I outrank you."

"Oh trust you to pull rank," an arrogant grin was her only reply as they walked towards a flabbergasted White.

"So you're the latest guy on my ass. I mean Renfro was a bitch but she liked me alive. Why do you want me dead so much?" she asked cocking her hip to the side. She smiled sensually and winked as the guards surrounded her and Jondy and the two sisters went back to back.

"Oh I like him, he's kinda cute," Jondy announced pointing to Otto even as White's men drew their guns, "You think this has something to do with that Sandeman guy? I mean the reason why they want you so much."

"Glad you could stop by 210. Now we'll have to birds with one stone. Get them!" White ordered covering up the surprise he'd felt when they'd uttered his father's name.

She grinned as the men jumped forward to grab them and the two jumped up contemporarily kicking their legs out and smashing two men to the ground each.

452 landed again, her eyes turning cold, like stone as she faced her opponents. She felt the swoosh of air as someone raised a gun to her back and her elbow shot back subconsciously as her left hand snatched the gun away and shot a man heading for her. A foot kicked the gun away and she grinned turning towards her attacker. 

Never hesitating she lashed out; a perfectly aimed punch flying towards the man's skull following by a right hook into the man's gut causing him to recoil in pain. Grabbing his head in her hands she smashed it upon her knee; a deep, dark side of her reveling in the blood that flew as she felt his bones smash against her flesh.

She could see Jondy with the back of her eye fighting beside her. She could feel her mind become one with her body, as more men punched and kicked at her.

The beast was roaring at its door, smashing its whole body against it as she jumped a leg and kicked a man in the torso watching him fly and smash into the cage. She rolled her eyes at Asha's terrified scream losing her concentration long enough for someone's foot to smash into her back. 

Twisting her body as she jumped back up her legs wrapped against somebody's neck, the momentum swinging her round and the man smashing to the ground his neck snapped. The sound echoed in her ears, the animal within her growling to be released.

Her hits were precise and powerful and the sounds of flesh hitting flesh and the breaking of bones wafted through the warehouse. Her eyes glinted as she breathed unevenly and observed the massacre on the ground.

Blood was everywhere; on her face, clothes and she wiped her hands on the legs of her pants. White stood in front of her clapping, a gun in his hand, "Bravo. Congratulations for you have just taken out 12 of my men. And all that just to save a human. That's very martyr of you; sacrificing yourself for the blonde."

"What can I say Ames, I try," she taunted. 

"We'll I've caught my bigger fish. I don't need her anymore," His hand rose with the gun to a terrified Asha.

Her eyes clinched closed and her arms circled her knees as the shot rung out.

*******

Alec sat on a chair as Mole shouted commands left and right feeling all but helpful. Dread washed over him as he realized that he was letting history repeat itself. He was gonna stand on the sidelines saving himself like he'd always done.

White didn't sound like the kind of person someone wanted to tangle with but neither was he.

"Where are they?" his voice was low and tense barely hiding the ascent of sentiment.

"Oh like I'm gonna tell you so you can go and get yourself killed," the transhuman scoffed not even looking up from the screen, he was looking at, that showed the satellite footage.

Mole didn't even have time to blink suddenly finding himself pinned against a wall 2 feet from the ground. The hands around his neck tightened and he stared straight into Alec's green tempest eyes, "Where is she?"

Two arms wrapped around his own neck and yanked him off of Mole holding him suspended in mid air but he didn't change his expression as he looked at Joshua, "Little fella is in Sector 12."

Mole rubbed his neck righting himself; "She's on the docks. Steam factory. Go and get yourself killed, no skin off my back."

******

Jondy watched chilled in place as Max's body connected with White's making him miss the shot and knocking the gun away from him, "Get her out of there! NOW JON! Don't worry about me!"

Jondy jumped into action prying the cage open and pulling Asha out. 

452 jumped back onto her feet and began circling her opponent. She watched with the back of her eye her sister hesitate, watched the guilt and concern flash over her face, "Just go Jon!"

The sound of running feet comforted her and she focused her attention on the man in front of her. Her nose scrunched up in disdain as he cracked his neck, "So what's this breeding cult thing-e-ma-jig Ames?" her expression was still 452's, a mocking tone, the same disobeying obedience she'd had at Manticore.

His answer was his fist as he shot out going straight for her face but she'd anticipated dodging the blow and going for one of her own to his midsection and propelling him to the ground where he smashed his face.

He rose again touching his split lip; "You seem to have done your homework 452. Then you must know that we don't feel pain," the quick quirk of surprise made him grin, "Oh you didn't know that. Well you DO feel pain."

Faking a left hook he swept his leg under hers and went to punch her but she rolled, "Well you see Ames. While you were busy doing . . . well whatever it is that you do, I was learning 'The hundred easiest ways to kill a man'."

Fingers curled her palm shot out hitting his kneecap smashing it back with a resounding crack quickly followed by a kick between his legs. Her arms grabbed his shoulders flinging him off of her and into a stone pillar.

Not missing a beat she jumped to her feet again and back into the fight. The punches and blocks and kicks and spins seemed to be an orchestrated game, a practiced routine. The sound of cracking bones and hitting flesh becoming a symphony nursing the animal. 

Her shoulder ached from when she'd fallen on it and it felt stiff and swollen. Her head seemed full of cotton from when she'd banged it but none of it mattered. Her movements were subconscious, instantaneous like nature. It was like she was detached from it all.

Pain flashed through her throbbing at her side, the familiar pain of a bullet graze and she turned with a flying kick smashing the risen man in the face breaking his jaw.

She could hear the sound of running feet, she knew that back up was coming but she ignored the voice that told her to run instead nursing the one that wanted to fight.

Her heart palpitated and her side felt like fire as her eyes crossed and she could feel the steel door giving way, breaking from the incessant pummeling. A fist smashed into her face sending her flying into the bars of the cage breaking her collar bone and ripping a scream from her throat that became a growl as the door inside her smashed, in unison with the warehouse door, and the animal was released.

Her opponent raised his eyes to the entrance and she took full advantage of his distraction throwing herself at him, punching, kicking, jabbing and using every trick she knew. Her eyes were fiery, burning and flashing with something primitive, the look a cornered predator would have.

Ames found himself staring into the eyes of a killer as he tried desperately to keep blocking her ceaseless attacks. She wasn't Max anymore, she wasn't 452 either; she was the animal every transgenic contained within themselves, some more successfully than others did.

*****

Alec could only feel the reverberating purr of the motor beneath him, hear the thundering buzz of the engine as he pushed the bike harder. In and out and between cars flying down the streets of Seattle. He could see the warehouse and the tall chainlike fence in front of it. A smile appeared upon his face as he gunned it harder and saw the ground move away from him as he sailed over it, the wind running through his hair.

The rear tire skidded knocking down the two men at the gate. Regaining his balance he sped for the door breaking it open and sending splinters of wood flying.

He didn't even worry as he dropped the bike onto its side and ran towards the fight. Her scream halted him and he watched the animalistic figure that had been Max throw herself into the fight, strength winning over mathematical precision.

He watched the blood fly from White's face as her fists crunched against his flesh breaking bones as if they were twigs. Adrenaline surged through his blood as he ran towards them. White on the ground unconscious with her on top smashing her hands into his face till her knuckles ached and burned, no doubt a couple of them broken.

His arms wrapped around her waist and he pulled her with him forcing her to run. He dragged her along out into the open and towards the gate as shots rang out behind them from guards that had come in aid of White and his men. He felt her jerk just a second before the telltale burning of a bullet ripped into his thigh. 

He stumbled for a split second before determination set into his face and throwing Max over his shoulder he jumped propelling himself airborne and over the gate.

******

She could feel the burning throb of an open wound oozing blood, the fire to her side and her shoulder. She could feel her broken collar bone and her knuckles grinding against each other and she didn't fight the darkness.

_Soft smile upon his far too pink lips as he trailed kisses on her abdomen. The silky texture of his blonde hair through her fingers made her shiver, "Brendan." _

_The intimate glow of the room turned to harsh and she squinted trying to see past it, "He didn't have to die. It's your fault he died you got attached."_

_The laser seared a path into her eye, pain shooting through her brain stem and down her spine, as she struggled against the restraints, "NO . . . you killed him, it was you . . ."_

_Rough hands shoved the horse bit into her mouth blocking her screams as the images began flashing past her eyes. Her body convulsed in the chair fighting against the pictures flashing. The straps held her down in place and the laser was incandescent. She fought, battled the images… DUTY… DISCIPLINE… MISSION… TRAITOR…_

_"You are nothing 452… you are a soldier… soldiers don't have feelings… they don't have the capacity to love… you're poison… Brendan's death is your fault… it's all your fault… your actions."_

_The blinding laser died but she was still strapped this time to a table. She tried to look away but there were mirrors on every wall and metal forced her eyes to stay open, forcing her to see the doctor's ghastly art that played on her chest._

_The scalpel cut and danced onto her naked skin, splitting it open, blood dribbling down to soak the towel beneath her. The bloodied tools reflecting over and over as a strangled scream was torn from her._

_"It's nothing personal 452 . . . we need to determine your mental stability . . . clone . . . 453 . . . schizophrenic . . . sadistic . . . nothing personal 452 . . . Sam . . ._

*******


	12. It Happened Again

**Disclaimer**

**Part 12**

The thumping of his heart bet painfully in his chest to the speed of his stride. He clutched Max close to his body, keeping her warm, trying not to jolt her about.

His right thigh felt like there was acid being poured onto it and he knew that he was bleeding but he pushed it all to the back of his mind, concentrating on his own breathing. His shirt felt wet and sticky with her blood and he clutched her tighter.

He was blurring now, forgetting about everything; he forgot about the people that watched in disbelief, forgot about the burning of his leg, forgot about Asha, about Sketchy and Cindy and Jondy, he forgot about Manticore, about Sam and about Cyd, the only thing in his mind was Max.

Her face was marred in a deep frown as she moved in his arms trying to fight him and he knew she was hallucinating. He focused his entire being on her, and getting her to Terminal City and to medical attention.

He didn't feel anything anymore, no pain, no joy and no despair only pure determination as he flew over the chain link fence of TC and burst into command center.

********

Dark shadows under her closed lids made them look even deeper sunk than truth and the paleness of her skin made her look more fragile. Her hair stuck to her sweat soaked brow and the only reason she wasn't thrashing anymore was because of the sedatives. 

The crimson hue of the liquid that gave and took life was on his clothes, staining fabric and skin, both dried and fresh; the shades of red reminding of red sunsets and the last few minutes of light. He shook his head ridding himself of the treacherous doubtful thoughts that cluttered his mind.

He couldn't take his eyes off of her as he lay beside her, his blood mixing with hers.

It felt like a movie scene; the kind where it's a critical moment, a momentous twist and surprise in the story as the character fought for their life. And as you watched them struggle to breathe and looked at their battered features as a second person stood by them crying and sobbing and the slow tinkle of piano keys was the only sound.

It was like he was seeing everything through a movie screen. He could hear the music while people ran around talking and shouting but could only see their mouths move, the pain and despair upon their face. Her didn't feel them cut into his leg searching for the bullet or try to stop Max's bleeding. He was mesmerized. The key character looked peaceful, not shocked or regretful but simply un-opinionated and accepting.

His entire being was focused on her and he didn't even see the medics finish bandaging and stitching, cleaning their wounds. He watched with child-like fascination as his swirled with hers on the metal of the makeshift operating table.

He felt his head waver; both from exhaustion and blood loss, as he fell into a peaceful sleep.

*******

Standing in a room he didn't recognize, he looked around unaltered or threatened. There were no walls that he could see; no ceiling and a soft mist, preventing him from seeing where everything ended and began, covered the floor. One staircase was the only thing visible.

The feeling was like she was floating in a cloud but yet the ground beneath her feet was solid and…cold. Light music floated in, from where she couldn't say and as she studied everything around her in search of its source she saw one man at the bottom of the stairwell. 

Alec turned hearing the sound of steps behind him and a shocked expression graced his mirthful lips as he watched her descend the steps. One hand held the hem of her dress, allowing her to walk freely, while the other skimmed the handrail. 

When her foot touched the floor and she stood in front of him, his face mere inches above hers, he couldn't help the frightened path his hands took to her body. Checking, desperately searching for her wounds. Her small hands stopped his calloused ones and she looked down herself for the first time. Her eyes widened as they met his again, "I'm wearing a dress!"

Feeling his heart miss a beat as he realized that she was fine he couldn't help the grin, "There's a first time for everything."

She rolled her eyes at him and smacked his shoulder, "I've worn a dress before you moron. I was just shocked coz I don't remember putting it on." 

Holding out his hand she took it not thinking twice, "You didn't Max. It's a dream."

Brown met green mixed with speckles of hazel, an earthy tone evolving that only served to increase his appeal in that moment, "Who's?"

"I don't know. I didn't know last time either," it was a simple answer but Max felt her own hope shatter in disappointment, "Oh. This has happened to you before."

Even knowing it was a statement he answered and she looked away embarrassed at her hopelessness. 

As they danced around the room, the soft sound of a piano, he focussed on her face, finding her eyes softer and open, unlike the closed and hard orbs he found whenever looking into those chocolate pools. And he felt his pulse escalate again.

She knew he was searching for something, uncertain, fearful and yet filled with raw emotion she couldn't identify he watched her intensely so much that she almost jumped when he spoke, "Why do you hide from me?"

His question was surprising but yet she found an answer ready on her tongue, "For the same reasons we all do. We can't bear to relive what we've gone through. You won't understand Alec. You can't understand; you weren't there. You did things and then they tried to make you forget, and when you couldn't forget they had ways of making you not care."

His heart sped at her words; words filled with emotion he'd never seen in her, having only ever found sarcasm and teasing. His arms pulled her closer and she snuggled deeper in his embrace, "There are things I've done too. Things I should say but I never will but I should."

This was how it was supposed to be. Peaceful.

*********

The pain in her shoulder and side were still there but it had eased to a dull throb. She didn't dare open her eyes and see the medical equipment she knew would be there. Her mind searched for any clue on what had happened but her memory stopped when she was thrown into the cage.

It had happened again, like it had only happened once before and she'd been in Psy-ops for 6 months for it. Her eyes clenched as she fought the surfacing images, she fought the thoughts that she couldn't rid herself of, the voices inside her that told her she was just like 453. 

It was the same side of her that told her that Brendan's death was her fault, and the one that insisted Manticore had killed him was getting smaller by the day, growing weaker.

The day she'd seen his body, battered, bruised and bloodied and short gasping breaths only seeming to get smaller as they dragged him away from her, was the day she'd lost control for the first time. Just like it had happened with White, the beast had escaped in all its ferocity.

She could hear the heart monitor that Dix had made speed up. The beeps sounded frantic to her ears as she fought inside her own mind, as she fought her own memories of what they'd shown her, of what she'd done.

A soft hand on her forehead startled her and her lids snapped open catching onto Jondy's, "Hey babe," the whispered words tearing her thoughts from the spiraling destruction they'd headed for.

Her sister's eyes were shiny with moisture but Max knew that Manticore training would forbid letting either cry. It had happened again.

*******


	13. Reaching the Edge

**Disclaimer**

**Part 13**

To say he'd been surprised when he woke up and Max wasn't next to him was a serious understatement. The soft covers beneath him were rumpled like his clothes but he could still smell that undeniable scent of hers impregnated on himself yet the cold spoke that they'd been empty for a while and his eyes softly opened.

He jumped out of bed a haggard and frightened look on his face as every memory flooded back to his brain. The surroundings were unfamiliar and his fluorescent green orbs looked left and right as if looking for a clue that might reveal everything to him. 

Forgetting his injured leg he jolted forward intent on going in search of her when reality brought him crashing to the ground . . . literally.

A soft groan reverberated out of his throat and he took deep breaths trying to grab a semblance of control and steady his beating heart, pushing the throbbing pain away from his thoughts. No matter how much he tried he couldn't control his mind to analyze the situation. Only the distinct feeling that he should be with her, make sure she was okay ran through his thoughts.

An intake of breath alerted him to someone else's presence and his face shot up locking gazes with blue pitying irises, "I don't want your pity Jondy," he ground out, lifting himself to his feet, "Where is she?"

The X5 looked a little taken aback but for which sentence he wasn't sure, maybe a little of both, "I'm not showing you pity Alec. You've been in this world far longer than me and you still insist on seeing in people's eyes what you want to see, what's most advantageous for you. Or maybe it's your pride."

His thigh felt like it was being squeezed into pulp but he bit back on the pain and took a tentative step forward, "Where's Max? Why did they take me here?"

Jondy kept her distance but Alec was sure it wasn't fear of him that kept her away, "We moved you to a different room for space purposes and believe me when I tell you that it was better this way. But that doesn't mean you can walk on that leg of yours."

"Where is she?!" he growled in anger as she refused to tell him, "Alec you were hurt worse than you think. The last thing you should be doing is walking. That bullet was an inch away from hitting your artery."

He blew up in a fit of rage throwing his body forward and smashing the wall either side of her head with his fists, "WHY WON"T YOU TELL ME WHERE SHE IS?"

Not so much as blinking Jondy held his gaze, "Because I know Max. And there's a few things we have to straighten out between me and you before I let you run off to her."

His nose scrunched and he squinted slightly at her blinking, "Jondy I have no idea what you're talking about. I'm not interested in anything more than friends with you," he explained.

Her laugh only confused him further, "Oh Alec you can't seriously be that self centered?!"

The blank look she received made her chuckle once again and she scratched her chin, "I have no interest in being in a relationship with you. Sit down Casanova."

Offended relief washed over him and though in reluctance, he found himself obeying.

******

Max was thankful that her bandages needed changing. Not for the pain or discomfort of it, but because the task allowed her to focus her attention on the present and not the past.

Creek's hands, careful to keep his touch light and not put pressure on her skin, grasped her arms just above her elbows helping her to find her footing. She masked the wrenching pain of her wounds and using Creek's aid she got out of bed moving carefully but fast enough to get a disapproving glare from the medic.

It wasn't as if she couldn't move, for she could have gotten up by herself if need be but her pride had momentarily taken the backseat as she decided to avoid the pain.

He smiled at her and feigned amazement, "Wow Max! You didn't even hit me or bat my hands away!" he exclaimed in a light-hearted tone.

She shrugged, "I thought I'd humor you. I might as well try this accepting help thing once in a while. If it had been anyone else I probably wouldn't have tried, but you're special Creek."

Rolling his eyes at her sarcasm he pulled a face as he began unwinding the gauze from her side but knowing that she was in more pain than she'd ever let on, "Good thing these boxers of yours are low or I might have had to ask you to take them off."

She bit her lip from whimpering as the last bit of gauze came away ripping the scab. Swallowing audibly she joked not fully able to remove the shaking from her voice, "Not eager to get in my pants? That's a first."

"Pffftt," was the only reply she received. 

His fingers were gentle on her bruised and raw skin as he applied this and that to stop infection soon repeating the same process to her shoulder bullet hole. One of her arms was in a sling immobilizing her broken clavicle that was already well on it's way to healing.

She smiled at him when he began spinning round her re-bandaging her side and he grinned back, "You're still the same little girl you always were. Just bitchier."

Rolling her eyes at him she looked away seeing a glimpse of the boy he'd been.

Helping her back onto the bed he turned to leave stopping at the door and looked at her, "He would be proud of you Max. He always was," his soft-spoken words affected more than she'd have liked to admit and she broke the stare.

******

Alec sat back down on the bed, his leg propped up on the mattress the other dangling freely off the edge as Jondy studied him and he couldn't help the distinct sense of déjà vu he felt at the situation at hand, "Try not to be as cryptic as last time Jon."

She tilted her head smiling and leaned back into the chair as she recalled their last conversation, "Max is far more than she seems but you probably already know that."

His eyes stared in confusion and impatience as she continued, "There's things about her that nobody knows except only a few of us, her unit, know. And there are things about her, things that have happened to her that she buries within her. Things that even I don't know."

Listening in silence his nerves calmer than before he thought carefully about his words, "We all do."

She smiled sadly and nodded, "Yeah. We all do. But what I'm trying to say is that Max has never talked to anyone about how she felt, about those things as I'm sure you have for at least some, " at his nod she carried on, "She's built up all the betrayal, hurt, pain and confusing treacherous things and I have a feeling she's gonna reach the brim soon."

"Twenty years is a long time," he stated for no other reason than the need to hear his own voice and control his mind with its sound, "Yeah, it is. I just wanted you to know, that when she breaks, she'll break to you."

******


	14. Pathways to the Great Indoors

**Disclaimer**

**Part 14**

_She'll break to you. . . _The words swam round in his head, rebounding this way and that, only tossing him further into the river of confusion -named Max- that threatened to suck him under with the mystery that shrouded her. As he studied the surface of the door in front of him Alec mused to himself caught up in his own thoughts. He hadn't been surprised at all when they'd told him that Max was already awake and they were letting her leave the infirmary. What had surprised him was that she'd agreed to stay put in her own apartment for a couple of days. 

Pushing the door open he stepped into the room, a subconscious shiver at the medical equipment within it, resurfacing with memories he'd much rather keep buried. He hadn't known her for all that long but something told him that whoever had compromised with her was either an extremely skilled negotiator of they'd given Max a whole lot more drugs. 

Brown coffee bean colored pools flicked to him catching his, a lost and slightly vulnerable look in her eyes. Widening in surprise she blinked wiping every trace of the emotion he'd seen from her shiny irises. 

An X5 he now knew as Creek had walked into his room, interrupting his conversation with Jondy and breaking the anxious silence. He'd asked if Max's sister could take her back to their place and a small smile had flitted across her mouth. Quickly shifting the job to him she'd left blurting something about Headquarters and for the life of him Alec wasn't sure exactly why he thought this was a bad idea.

His leg hurt like hell but it was still better than a couple of hours before when he'd awoken this morning. It was the even throbbing in his leg, beating in tandem with his racing heart that brought him crashing back to earth and to the land of the living.

She was looking at him curiously now; studying his movements as if trying to detect what was making him feel so jittery. Growling at his thoughts and panicked assumptions he schooled his feelings and managed to acquire a semblance of control.

"Jondy had some stuff to do so they sent me to take you back to your apartment," he explained, content that his voice had remained even.

Nodding at him she remained quiet rising to her feet and finding her balance. He watched her, giving no visible sign of helping her, somehow knowing she didn't want it. Yet he stood close enough to be able to reach her in time should she grow dizzy or lose her footing.

Taking a first step she swayed imperceptibly but Alec's hand shot out, going to the small of her back and spreading his palm until every inch of skin was flat against the cotton of her dusky blue shirt. 

Sucking in a breath, his fingers brushed against the skin where her top didn't meet the jeans and he shut his eyes for a moment, missing the flicker of illegible and indecipherable emotion that glinted in her irises.

Leading her out of the infirmary he slowed his steps taking as much precaution as he could about her injuries. If it had been up to him he'd have left her in bed, strapped down to prevent her from escaping at all, but it was out of his hands. Fact of the matter was she'd pretty much become the brains, brawn and everything else behind this operation. She'd become leader of the transgenics without even trying.

The sun was out, a rarity in this Seattle season and Alec let his lips catch a small smile when he caught her closing her eyes and letting the soothing, hot fingers of the sunrays tickle and glow against her face.

The silence was taught and yet held a calming familiarity as they walked side by side towards Max's TC apartment. Millions of questions flew in and out of his mind, zipping past his eyes where she caught glimpses of his curiosity. But she looked away from his glance-stealing eyes, studying the broken pavement and scatter of litter.

It was Alec who broke the silence but even straining her ears she had difficulty deciphering the tune as he hummed a song. She could see her building a fair way off, the top floors poking out above all the others but she couldn't get her attention off his in-tune mumbling.

She smiled confused as he caught her eyes and a quick 'Possum-in-headlights' flitted across his face before it was gone replaced by a small grin, "Sorry," he said apologetically, "Didn't know I was doing it out loud."

She shook her head laughing softly her hand on her wound trying to stop the hurting, "What were you humming?"

He shrugged, embarrassed and non-committed, "Ah it was nothing," he explained, "Just a pre-pulse song I though fit the mood a little."

Max was beyond curious now as they slowly trudged towards her place, his hand still at her back and she leant into it, closer to his warmth, "I want to know," she told him in a hushed soft tone. Her head swayed a little and dizziness and nausea swept over her. Her hand shot out in reflex grabbing his shoulder to get her balance again.

Anger sparked in Alec, disbelief to the fact that they'd let her WALK back to her apartment, "That's it, I'm carrying you the rest of the way, you shouldn't even be out of bed, much less walking," he ground through gritted teeth and he picked her up much like you would pick a child and comfort it; surprising both her and himself at his protectiveness.

She couldn't find the words to stop him and her hands went round his neck as she leant her chin on his shoulder. His arms kept her close to him, one below her buttocks and the other on her back safely.

"It's not so bad," she muttered next to his ear, her soft puffs of breath tickling his ear and taking Alec to a higher plane of sensation, "It's not like I haven't had to do it before now. Manticore wasn't big on the whole, 'Stay-in-bed-coz-you're-sick', 'specially for me."

Lips pulled in a tight line and his jaw set Alec kept on walking, his footsteps small and smooth to not jar her about.

The heavy silence once again fell between the pair sending both into deep thought and though carrying Max was barely an effort for him, his breath labored and strained. Alec suspected it had to do with the soft puffs of breath she expelled on the side of his cheek and neck as it sparked tingles of sensation to shoot down his spine.

Their closeness was affecting him way more than he'd ever admit and Alec tried to steady his heartbeat to match his footsteps, long and steady in their rhythm. He could see her building up ahead and he sent a silent thank you to the blue lady as he approached the front doors.

Climbing the stairs he looked around, he couldn't help but compare the path he took to her apartment to the path he was taking to the real Max. To see clearly the glimpses he'd caught of everything inside. He noted the relatively clean walls, free of graffiti or defacing and vandalizing unlike nearly every building in Seattle including his. Only a layer of dust coated the hallways and handrails, untouched and undisturbed.

He reached the top floor and headed down towards the only door holding his breath, for a reason even beyond him. Walking in silence down the corridor, treading so softly as to not disturb the peace that seemed to hover inside. His hand reached out turning the knob and pushing the door open, not without trouble.

The hinges were rusted and unused causing Alec to push decisively harder to finally open it and close it behind. A small surprised look flitted across his face at the interior as he let his eyes flutter over the room.

Unlike the tidy corridors the walls were covered inch by inch in a tide of colors and words and pictures messily styled upon the smooth surface. Spray paint cans, used and new, lay on the floor scattered about. Even the floor was layered in scribbles and swirling designs. Still in a daze he softly set Max onto the couch, never taking his eyes away from the intricate symbols.

The ceiling was a stark white in comparison and the furniture was decent enough, simple and untouched. Worn and comfortable, the loud contrasts in the apartment somehow making it feel right.  
  
"Soothing isn't it?" she said quietly, a studious expression on her face.

Twirling round to look back at her a smile stretched his lips and he laughed, "Yeah," he nodded ruffling his own hair, "Weirdly so but yeah. I'll have to get your decorator's number."

Max smiled lost in thoughts of the man in front of her; so identical in feature to Ben yet completely different in character. Her head tilted softly as she stared at him in marvel. Alec was impetuous, strong willed, but a look of forgotten fun was never too far from him. Like he'd lost his ability to enjoy himself.

Realizing she'd been staring her eyes skittered away but his words brought her gaze back to his face; "Suits you to a T."

**Check your pulse it's proof that you're not listening to**

Eyes locked in an intricate dance of swirling irises, their minds churned alike.

As he looked at her sitting on the couch, legs curled up beneath her and laying her weight onto the side arm the song he'd been humming before floated back to his mind. He'd heard Cindy singing along to it one day in her room when she'd thought she was by herself. 

John Mayer was some pre-pulse singer he'd never heard of. He'd hassled her nonetheless as it was a serious difference from her usual music but he'd been sworn to secrecy.

**The call your life's been issuing you**

His sister had been silent, thoughtful and obedient, to Manticore and the Blue Lady from their childhood. She'd never gotten into a fight on her own will. Max was different; cheeky and in your face, she was the queen of spontaneity. Alec didn't know if that's how she'd always been but it was something he desperately wanted to know. 

For the second time in his life, his body mind and soul ached to know what made the woman in front of him who she was. 

**The rhythm of a line of idle days**  
  
With Cyd it had been so easy to know the short story. She'd been traveling by herself since she'd been 10 or 11; Alec didn't need to guess why she hadn't changed in character all that much. Unlike him or Jesse who had spent time in one place, made friends, made a life; Cyd had always been moving, never stopping and smelling the roses.****

**Scared of a world outside you should go explore**

He sat down on the armchair rather than the couch, giving her the space he thought she wanted, the distance he believed she needed and missed the flash of disappointment. 

He leant his elbows on his knees leaning forward and sighed stretching his neck side-to-side trying to get rid of the kinks, "Am I allowed to know?"

His words once again surprised her and she blinked confused for a moment, "Are you allowed to know what?" she asked in curiosity, "The meaning of the words and pictures and symbols scribbled all over your apartment for one."

**Pull all the shades and wander the great indoors**

Max shrugged uncomfortably but before she could reply Alec continued, "Tell me about Manticore, about Psy-Ops."

**The great indoors**

Stone like features replaced the softer ones she'd worn, "They're not things that should be repeated. It's not something anyone will ever tell you about at the drop of a hat. There's a million and one things we endured; because of your unit, because of our DNA and because of our 'mistakes'."

Alec looked away ashamed, for the first time, of ever having escaped, "I wanna know what I caused you," he said, "I need to know what we caused. Why you hate me," he muttered.

"I never said I hated you. It was the other way around remember?" Max accused, "Sure just like every other 09' out there you're a higher-than-thou asshole but I don't hate you. Envy maybe, but envious of your escape not anything else. I never hated you, not even your sister."****

**Lamplight makes the shadows play**

A quick thought over what other 09ners she might have met entered his mind before he shrugged it off. His eyes watched his own hands play with the hem of the navy shirt he wore and at the ascent of emotion he clenched his eyes to block the images resurfacing fresh in his mind as if it had just happened.

"Since we're knee deep in painful subjects. Tell me about her, about Sam," Max asked in genuine sincerity.

Alec looked up concentrating on a spot on the wall, letting his eyes follow the words and contours on the walls, "When we were kids, back at Manticore, she always wanted answers for everything. You know? Why we were there, what was outside. So she would make up these fantastic stories to explain things. Somehow it made us feel...loved. Like we weren't all alone."

Surprising even himself in how easy he was talking about it he paused and locked eyes with her once again but his gaze was unsteady and it wavered, "Sounds like a nice kid. What went wrong?"

**And posters take the walls away  
The T.V. is your windowpane**

Her brow furrowed in sincere curiosity and Alec found himself continuing, "After the escape we all split up, moved around a lot always covering our tracks. In Manticore we'd been kept away from many things but out here, it was like there were too many things in this world she didn't have answers for."

_Flashback_

_Running through the forest, hunting, searching for the convict. Sam leading them towards the man._

"I don't know. She just...lost it," he finished. He could still remember that day as clear as yesterday, the way their eyes had glinted, the adrenaline and the rush. The metallic, coppery taste of blood in his mouth and the sticky feel of it staining his gray sweat suit.****

**The view won't let you down**

His knee bounced up and down nervously and he sprung to his feet pacing back and forth in front of the windows unable to look at her. Talking about it was hard enough, telling someone who looked exactly like Sam didn't make it any easier. In his own mind he asked himself why he was even telling her in the first place but he didn't have an answer.

Head turning back to her he didn't have to look to know she was smiling and he watched her in confusion. She hid the smile quickly but pointed to the floor he walked on. Alec grinned reading the words he walked on, 'Pace, pace, pace, peace of mind, pace, pace . . .'****

**So put your faith in a late night show  
I bet you didn't even know**

It was with regret that she found herself asking the next question but she needed to know. She knew that the man in front of her must hold some of the answers to what she needed to know and the only thing she repented was the emotional pain her questions would no doubt cause him.

"How did Sam die?" she spoke softly almost afraid of his reaction, of his answer. Did she really want to know?

Shock, guilt and disbelief swam in his eyes, "They didn't tell you?!"

Despite his thoughts on his childhood home Alec had thought they'd at least have the decency to tell her exactly how her twin died. Obviously not.

**Depends on how far out you go  
The channel numbers change**

His heart was in his throat and he swallowed hard with no effect. His eyes closed and her face popped up in his mind. The way she'd looked as he'd held her in his arms, the sound of the helicopters. She'd looked every bit the 9 yr old sister he'd remembered. The same curious look was in her eyes but now buried in realization and terror.

Fear of Manticore, the nomlies and fear of herself.

"We were in the woods. She'd gotten hurt. Manticore was closing in on us. She didn't want to go back there," he strained out biting his tongue at the feel of the life being squeezed out of his heart.

**Scared of a world outside you should go explore**

"Reindoctrination. Or worse," Alec could only imagine what the worse was. He'd heard tales and stories and from the way her eyes had seemed to flicker in fright and understanding, had him wondering whether he really wanted to know what had happened to her.

"I killed her," he didn't miss the dumbfounded look on her face, "She asked me to, so I did. And then I ran. I saved myself. And I just left her body there for them to take away." 

The crack in his voice had been unavoidable but he resisted letting the tears fall leaving his eyes shiny with near overflowing moisture.

**Pull all the shades and wander the great indoors**

Max didn't have a clue on what to say, what to do, to give him the comfort he seemed to need. How does one comfort a long time escaped genetically enhanced human weapon? 

Booze.

Lifting an amber liquid filled bottle and two glasses from under the couch she set it on the coffee table and looked at him expectantly, "Tissues are harder to come by. Me and Jondy make do with this." Alec didn't hesitate in dropping into the couch next to her, close enough that her feet – as she lay on her side, arms propped up on the armrest – were brushing against his thigh.

**Though lately I can't blame you**

Pouring the smooth sloshing liquid into 2 glasses she handed one to him and raised her own in a small toast and acknowledgement, "We really shouldn't drink considering but what's the point in owning superior metabolisms if you cant indulge yourself," she said swallowing the searing solution letting it swoosh down her throat.

Alec followed en suit, smacking his lips at the sensation, emptying his glass in one go and immediately giving it to her to refill.

**I have seen the world**

Silence fell returning once again; it hung with unanswered question and unsolved and untold stories of horrors and human cruelty.

"I never hated your sister," she repeated softly and her dwelling thoughts on it sparked his curiosity once more as he waited for her to continue, "Not even when I went to Psy-Ops twice because of her."

She stilled, a remembering look upon her face, "Did you have a dream Alec? I mean, when I was shot and I passed out… did you dream anything that night?"****

**And sometimes wish your room had room for two**

Slightly taken aback at the quick change of subject he could only nod for a few seconds before he regained his voice, "Yeah I did."

A strange expression he couldn't decipher fell on her brow and he watched in awe as she turned her body and laid her head onto his chest leaning into him and pushing him down till he lay with his head on a cushion. Her body melded into his quickly finding a comfortable position.

**So go unlock the door  
And find what you are here for**

His fingers idly toyed with a strand of her hair as he mused over what had just happened in confusion. He'd wanted to find out about her and in the end he'd told her about him, about Sam and what was most perplexing was that it felt like a huge weight had been lifted off his shoulders.

Max could hear his heartbeat thump evenly in his chest as drowsiness and exhaustion started claiming her, "I'm sorry about Sam Alec. It was the best choice you could have taken, the merciful thing to do," she managed to slur.

She wasn't ready to talk of anything to do with her yet, Max didn't know if she'd ever be ready, in this lifetime or the next, but somehow tonight she'd come closer than ever before.

**Leave the great indoors  
Please leave the great indoors**

The lids to her eyes, weighed down by sleepiness, closed shut and Alec listened to her breath even out and as he floated out of consciousness right behind her the song played once again in his mind but this time he sang it out loud in a deep hushed tone and he watched Max involuntarily shiver, "Check your pulse it's proof that you're not listening to. The call your life's been issuing you. The rhythm of a line of idle days."


	15. Losing Oneself

**Disclaimer**

**Part 15**

Asha looked around at her surroundings feeling out of place. Everyone around seemed to be pissed off at her and from the dagger looks and flames sent her way they were ETREMELY pissed off with her. Scratching her arm awkwardly she remained seated on the couch waiting to be told when OC arrived.

******

"Now that is quite a sight," Apion said, his voice kind and caring, empty of any joke.

Jondy grinned leaning against the doorframe and nodded knowingly before twisting her head to look at Mole, "Looks like she didn't tell."

"Looks like **he** spilled the beans," the lizard replied in his gruff croak as he looked at Alec's peaceful features. He lay on the couch stretched out completely, Max on his chest breathing softly in a peaceful sleep with a crooked little smile on her face.

The group had come to check up on the soldier that now looked nothing more than a girl, for once not haunted by her past. Jondy smiled tenderly before turning and silently walking out knowing they'd follow her. The door closed with a quiet scrape and click, for once not struggling.

******

Max was barely awake. She was in that trance that people find themselves in when they're completely comfortable in their surroundings. The one of a Saturday morning despite the fact that it was Thursday afternoon, when they're free of worry or stress and they know they could lie there the whole day. 

She hadn't experienced this feeling in a long time, so long that she couldn't remember when. She didn't want to remember. Remembering meant thinking and she was perfectly content to lie there on her warm soft pillow; the pillow that was rising and sinking.

Somewhere in the back of her brain she knew that pillows didn't move, but this one was. Her eyes slowly flickered open and came to rest on golden skin. It was an arm, and that arm was wrapped around her. Her eyes widened in surprise and panic as she tried to recall the reason why.

Thump

All Alec knew was that one second he'd had a nice soft body keeping him warm and the next it wasn't there anymore leaving behind a cold dent as the air hit the place where it had been.

A muffled curse snapped him into consciousness and he shot up letting his eyes fall to the ground and he desperately struggled to stop a grin from splitting his lips. Max lay there on her back looking up at him as stiff as a plank of wood. Her eyes were shocked and her hair was in disarray around her head forming a dark halo.

She relaxed as her brain woke up fully and everything flooded back. He lifted her back up onto the couch smiling as she studied him.

Her eyelashes were long and dark, curled and flapping lightly against her cheeks when she blinked. Swirling pools of coffee seemed darker than usual and her mocha skin was warm and pink from sleep. Still wearing the black shirt and black sweat pants, the only thing contrasting was the white sling still holding her arm in place. 

She looked the part of an angel, the soft features and incredibly full lips and doe eyes; a dark angel, "How's your shoulder?" he asked quietly breaking the stare, "And your clavicle, and the hole in your side?"

She smiled a little and shrugged, "It's good. Creek is a talented patcher upper."

"Yeah he is," Alec stated more than anything, rubbing his thigh and wincing slightly. The pain was gone replaced by a dull pulse but it still ached if he moved it.

The silence that seemed to stretch was achingly long and Max in then end awkwardly looked away and Alec cleared his throat, "Well since I'm gonna be looking after you for a couple of days I might as well start by feeding us both."

"You can cook?" Max asked with a quirk of a smile

"Don't sound so surprised," Alec replied in a wounded puppy tone and she chuckled, "There are many things you don't know."

Shrugging she nodded, "Fair enough. I just figured you being the strapping young bachelor stud that you are you would go out and eat takeaways," she explained standing from the couch and gingerly walking to the kitchen bench where she dropped onto a stool.

"Strapping young stud?" Alec repeated with a raised eyebrow.

"You forgot bachelor. And stop playing parrot," shaking his head he began searching through the cupboards.

"I didn't use to know. As you said, I pretty much ate takeaways at every meal, and then I met Cindy and Kendra and Asha. And ganging up against me they all decided that it wasn't healthy and ran me through a cooking intensive course," he explained smiling at the memory.

"She cares about you, you know?" Max said softly not even knowing why she was saying it, "She really does."

Alec didn't speak right away as he mixed and stirred and added ingredients to his mixture, "Yeah . . . I know," he turned and smiled, breaking the somber tone of their conversation, "But at the moment I don't wanna think about me. You're gonna have to explain to me the graffiti central that is your apartment."

Max shook her head but a soft smile graced her lips, a genuine grin free of pain or memories, "Alright you cook and I'll explain and then if you're good I'll show you some."

Nodding in agreement with an impish beam he turned the flame on underneath the pan and while he waited for it to heat he leant back against the cupboards waiting for her to speak, "It's a release I guess," she began contemplatively, "Instead of working through it by venting it into violence on each other, me and Jondy do this. We write or draw how we feel and it's like it lets you release what you feel. It feels like it's not so hard to deal with it. And the older some things get or if they're sorted out they get partly covered by new designs and it makes it fade away."

Her eyes were squinted slightly in thought as she looked into space explaining and the other X5 couldn't help a quirk at the corners of his mouth, "Sounds like a good idea."

"It is," she agreed as he flipped the first pancake.

******

Original Cindy handed the steaming cup of coffee into the shaking hands of the still in shock blonde. Plumping down next to her OC wrapped an arm around her, "Tell Original Cindy how it is Asha."

She couldn't help but feel for the girl, but that didn't mean she wasn't gonna get a few things straightened out and bring home some truths, OC figured it'd be good for everyone to tell it how she saw it, might as well start with Asha.

*****

Awe struck he studied the colors, shapes and words and squiggles that carefully and hazardously tinted the wall in front of his nose. His eyes flicked left to right and diagonally in every direction trying to wrap his mind around the designs.

"You did this?" came his whispered admiration; he turned catching her nod, "Show me."

Max had been sitting on her bed in her room while he scrutinized the murals on her walls. At his words she stood slowly, the pain still present in her side and in her collarbone. The sling was getting annoying but she ignored it knowing it was better if it stayed put. 

She came up beside him standing half in front of him as she took his hand in her own free one. Her fingers hovered over his brushing them as she moved their hands across the words and faces some of which familiar to him.

The warmth of her fingertips was sending jolts of electricity up his spine raising the hairs on the back of his neck and he couldn't help but feel like the sensation was going to short circuit him. Her touch was more definite now, her palm against the back of his hand running across dates and numbers he didn't understand.

Breathing in her scent mixed with his he felt as if someone had just yanked his lungs, emptied them of air and he couldn't breathe for what seemed like an eternity but in reality was no more than a second as a jolt of pain gripped his chest. It didn't bother him though; it sent his body into tingles and Alec's skin felt hypersensitive. 

Alec didn't know what was controlling him but his whole body all of a sudden seemed to detach itself from his mind. His arms turned Max till she faced him and he felt the air rushing out of his lungs again when her eyes met his burning.

Her cheeks were flushed and she was just as out of breath as he was. His world diminished shrinking till it only involved the face in front of him. The eyes that watched him in curious passion and for once were unshielded. The lips slightly parted, the long arch of her eyebrows and the shadows cast by her lashes as her lids fluttered. The deep coffee bean pools slowly vanished as her eyes drew closed and she leant further into him breathing him in.

Max was completely lost in the moment, completely lost in the man in front of her, the hard chest and the arms that surrounded her body. She'd forgotten this sensation; it had been a long time since a man had held her like this, a long time since she'd lost herself.

Alec smelt like freedom, childlike security. A million scents mixed into one big jumble yet faint enough to leave the tangy mix of cat and man dominant. He smelt like bakery and pine trees, the damp warm trace left behind after a storm and Max noted with a hint of amusement that there was a distinct aroma of pork rinds.

He could feel himself spinning out of control faster and faster losing himself in the woman he held and for the life of him he couldn't care less. His face was mere inches from hers, their breath intermingling to become one.

The softness of her lips when they brushed his could have been enough to knock him back but the last thing he wanted was for this to end. Max couldn't stop the deep throaty hum that could have been a purr. His lips were far too smooth for a man, so tender and moist against hers.

Her body pushed completely against him and his arms went to her waist careful to mind her injuries as her mouth pushed decisively against his to his complete pleasure. Moving his lips gently with hers his tongue flicked out to barely brush her lips tasting pancakes and syrup and something completely female and Max.

_"BRENDAN!"_

His bruised and battered face entered her mind, the expression of pain and anguish yet still filled with love and concern for. It was too much for Max and she pulled away with a gasp as she panted for air breathless.

"I can't do this," she whispered barely with any sound and ran to the bathroom slamming the door behind her.

Max couldn't handle it, couldn't deal with those thoughts. She needed 452.


	16. Staring Contests

**Dsiclaimer**

**Part 16**

"Hey Alec. What are you doing here? I thought you were with Max," Jondy asked as she fell in step with him, he was heading towards the infirmary, a glazed and impenetrable look in his eye. His limp was gone but Jondy knew from experience that his leg was still painful and the stubborn idiot was masking his hurt along with everything else.

"I was. She's taking a shower and I figured she'd need to change her bandages when she came out. I was going to ask Creek for some," he explained in monotone, his voice distant as if he was deep in thought.

'Not a bad excuse for making it up on the spot' Jondy mused 'What has that girl done now?'

"I'll go and help her. You go find Creek so he can check that leg of yours, it seems your bandages need changing too," Alec looked down to see his denim covered thigh stained with blood. When he looked back at Jondy she was gone leaving him to scratch his head on where she might have disappeared to.

**********

By the time Max came out of the shower Alec was gone. In his place was a certain blue-eyed X5 she knew well that was staring at her with an annoyed expression upon her brow and a slight frown to her lips as she waited expectantly for an explanation. For a second Jondy let the thought that perhaps Alec hadn't lied flutter through her mind but she dismissed the thoughts focusing instead on her sister.

The blue robe she had on felt soft against her skin, smooth and soothing. Her hair was pinned up, still wet from the shower. Her bandages had soaked during it and the two sisters' eyes met in silent understanding of this, "C'mon let's change those."

Max shed the robe without question and stood straight lifting her arms to allow Jondy to unwind the gauze. Neither X5 had any problem with her nudity and their conversation continued unaffected apart from one or two hisses escaped from Max.

"Wanna tell me why you strive so hard to be unhappy?" began Jondy, not one to beat around the bush. Max clenched her teeth as her sister softly padded the skin around her wound to dry it. The bullet wound in her side was healing quickly, the skin had clotted and closed rapidly even for an X-series. The swelling on her shoulder was almost completely gone and her collarbone wasn't as sore but she knew she'd have to take it easier for at least a few days.

Her eyes shifted, unable to keep with the solid gaze that Jondy held on her, "I don't. It just happens, born talent," she ground out and Jondy didn't miss the self-loathing in her voice.

Tightening the bandage around her middle, maybe a bit too harshly, she began wrapping it around her sister's midsection, "I didn't care what rank you were at Manticore and I very well don't care what alpha rating you hold now. You listen to me and you listen good cause somebody needs to straighten you out once and for all."

Passing Max her robe Jondy pushed her down firmly but gently until she was sitting down at the foot of the bed, "You are so caught up in your own drama that you can't see a good thing when it comes and bites you in the friggin' ass!" she fumed pointing an accusing finger in Max's face, "You're 20 years old Maxie! It's nearly been 4 years you need to let it go!"

Max's eyes swirled with anger and pain and turning stormy they met the other girl with fury that was matched as they stared each other down into submission, "You can't possibly tell me to let it go because you don't know how I feel!" she bit back face to face, brown against blue.

"He loved you! He loved all of us! You didn't lose out all by yourself you know," she spat out, "We all lost him!" she pleaded with her sister to understand, trying to shake her into realization of what not even Jondy was sure.

"You don't think that eats at me?! You don't think I blame myself even more for that?! It was all my fault Jondy. Sure it wasn't me who bet him, bruised him, and broke every bone in his body. I DIDN'T CUT INTO HIM PERSONALLY OR TORTURED HIM TO DEATH!!!" she yelled her voice rising with every word until she was basically screaming, "But it all happened because of me Jon! I was the reason they hurt him," Max's voice broke and came out as a whimpered sob, "You lost him because of me. And you know what they did after I got out of Psy-ops 4 months later? After I lost control? They put salt in the freaking wound!"

The sound of rolling thunder interrupted and a flash of light lit both their eyes revealing deeper emotion.

"You shoved it up their ass Maxie! They wanted to make you failure, an example of a weak soldier but you fucking shoved it up their ass. You cannot eat their bullshit about clearing your record because of Sandeman! Manticore kept you cause you were one of the best and you know it," the paler X5 argued back holding her sister by the top of her arms careful of the one that had been immobilized to keep her broken bone still.

And Max turned tail and ran out the door, down the stairs and barefoot into the streets of Terminal City not even knowing herself to where she was heading. Jondy closed her eyes releasing a tired sigh, "You never ran before Max. Why are you doing it now?" she asked the empty room.

*********

OC had listened, without interrupting, to Asha's story; to everything she felt and had revealed and now the blonde had cried every single tear out of herself so much that she didn't even have the strength to sniffle anymore.

"Gurl listen to OC cause she understands how you feel but lemme break it down for ya. When our boy came back he went straight for your place, that says somethin', Original Cindy's almost jealous boo," this drew a soft smile from the blonde before it vanished as quickly as it had come, "But seeing you wrapped in someone else's arms cut him deep you can't lie to yourself bout that. Alec isn't gonna care you sent that boy packin' now, he isn't gonna forget and forgive cause you betrayed him in a sense. Don't get OC wrong you haven't lost him as a friend . . . but anything more than that has flown away . . . well even if you'd become that and none of this had happened between ya'all Original Cindy still thinks it wouldnta lasted."

Asha took a deep breath calming herself down and scrubbed at her sticky tear tracked cheeks again as she listened to Cindy, "He's with his own for the first time in more than a decade. You saw how he was round Cyd and them, he was the happiest you ever seen. There's a difference 'tween his unit and the others though. He doesn't see Max as family, he sees her like a boy sees a girl but Original Cindy don't think even he is clued in on dat."

******

It had been a short battle with himself on whether he was gonna go and get re-bandaged or not and NOT had won. He wanted to be alone and the last thing he needed was to be around anyone that knew about Max, much less someone from her unit.

Not even a step in the opposite direction he found his way blocked by an X6 he'd seen before. The boy was grinning as a soft breeze tufted his curly blonde hair into different directions. Alec stared at him wearily, unconvinced at the innocence of that smile, having worn it countless times himself, Alec sidestepped biting his tongue not to flinch at the pain that gripped his leg.

Before he could move forward and continue on his path a girl popped in front of him blocking his path. Another X6 wearing the same impish smile and Alec was beginning to not like what was happening. He didn't even have to move again before another moved in front of him out of nowhere.

Face after face appeared in front of him until he was fully surrounded by grinning, curious trangsenics. _And annoying_ if you asked him. But no one did ask they merely began walking towards the infirmary building and he was forced to walk in the same direction.

Alec wasn't an idiot, no doubt they'd noticed his bleeding leg but he also knew there were other reasons for this . . . escort. Always the stubborn one he refused to limp, gasp or flinch in the slightest as he strode. He caught the girls watching him impressed and admiringly, forcing him to bury a grin as the boys puffed out their chest almost challengingly in jealousy.

The unanimous sound of feet on the linoleum resembled marching and Alec purposely quickly fell out of time. Creek watched him from the other side of the room and with a knowing sad smile his gaze met the other man, understanding at his actions.

"I guess there's no difference between '09 escapees and the ones who stayed behind. We're all stubborn sons of bitches," the dark haired man told him nodding to the leg stained in red. Alec matched his smirk but he didn't move from his position as he appraised the other X5. Noting he was taller Alec quickly banished the thought as far too petty. Creek had done nothing to him, there was no need to be hostile.

His shoulders rolled as he stretched them and though he stayed upright and stiff Creek noticed him relax and calm himself, "Any reason why you sent your little hush puppies to fetch me?"

Creek's burst of laughter raised Alec's eyebrow as the two men ignored the bristled X6's, "Hey they're not my 'hush puppies'," the darker X5 defended, "They're Max's little evil doers. But I did send them to fetch you cause you've torn the stitching to your leg."

Mole's rasp turned everyone's head towards him, "Well what do you expect he's an '09."

Meeting in unvoiced animosity the two transgenics stared the other down. Alec didn't back down from the challenge; boring holes in the other's head with no sign of stopping. Creek shook his head annoyed at the transhuman but as he opened his mouth to speak something he'd never thought would happen in a million years happened. Mole looked away.

Placing his rifle down the lizard man took a puff out of his cigar as he sat down in a chair. Alec didn't grin or taunt merely shifted his eyes to the other X5, Creek suddenly understanding the reason for Mole backing down. The fire within those eyes was frightening and it could challenge Max's stare any day.

The jingling of a belt buckle broke the silence and Alec's pants fell pooling at his ankles leaving him in boxers quickly followed by the sound of soft padded feet as all the X6's, spare the first he'd seen, left the room. 

Not wasting a second Creek crouched down taking a proper look at the wound. All the stitches had broken tearing it open. Blood trickled down his clenched thigh and past his knee to his calf, "I'm gonna have to cauterize it Alec. Think good thoughts."

Alec didn't budge, didn't even blink moving his gaze to the blonde X6 all of a sudden remembering who he was. He was the one that had burst into command; he'd been on the mission with Max. Apion.

Snapping out the blade Creek passed it over the lighter making it glow red-hot as Alec stared at Apion, the incandescent metal reflecting in a quick flash. There was no hatred in his eyes, no fear or pain, nothing but remembrance as he focused his attention on the boy to keep his mind from wandering and thinking about the oncoming sting. 

Blade touched skin, thunder rumbling in the distance followed by a flash of lightning as the sizzling sound and bitter smell of burning flesh rose in the room. The only sign that Alec had felt the touch was the gasp his lungs made as he inhaled quickly holding his breath. No one dared break the silence that had enveloped the room leaving only dying hiss of hot against flesh and the tit tattering of rain as it began falling and hitting the windows.

Apion's eyes searched anything to focus on, anything but the naked stare of the man that had fallen into the web of Max, the web no man seemed to be able to escape. It was only then that Alec realized the younger boy's discomfort and he turned away as by mere coincidence Creek finished tending to his leg. 

He pulled his pants back up and re tied the belt, "If the staring contests are done I'm leaving."

The sound of the door slamming shut brought a smile to Mole's scaly lips and nodding he muttered through his cigar, "Our Maxie's got herself a contender. He's alright by me."

Creek snorted, "What, he was man enough in the face of pain so he's alright by you to bang it with her?" Mole smiled, Creek almost sounded disturbed.

"Transgenic enough in the face of pain," Mole corrected, "And no, that isn't the only reason why. He's got enough balls to deal with her, emotionally and physically."

Creek shook his head with a chuckle, "I guess we'll see."

*******

Standing outside Alec breathed a sigh of relief, his leg was on fire, it felt like some higher power was wringing the life out of it, squeezing out every last drop. Only then did he become aware of the rain, felt it's soothing cold fingers wash over him and cool the heat of his leg, calmed his quickened pulse as he took a deep breath trying to purge Max from his thoughts.

Closing his eyes he breathed again trying everything to get her off his mind Pizza . . . Max and me having pizza . . . nope . . . mud . . . yeah mud's good; mud, mud, mud . . . Max and mud . . . oh god, back track Alec do NOT go there Snapping his eyes open to stop the flashing images he caught sight of a flicker of movement, the rain and quick sweeping nightfall blurring his vision.

And then he saw it again a flash of blue was running towards the perimeter. Zooming in he laughed to himself seeing that the runner was in fact wearing a blue robe, and nothing else by the looks of things. That almost looks like Max he mused before laughing at his own wishful thinking.

Alec saw the girl falter but he was too far away and his leg was in too bad a shape for him to do anything. She crashed to the ground hands flying forward and stopping her head from colliding with the asphalt not a moment too late. Her small body shuddered and he recognized the familiar shake of shoulders as her body was racked with sobs.

He allowed the limp as he jogged as fast as he could over to her still fallen form. When his careful fingers touched her shoulders he felt her tense. One second he was bending over her the rain cascading upon them and the second he was on his back with incredibly strong arms pinning him down.

Recognizing the face that hovered over his he stared in shock. Max's breath was ragged and uneven and she wore his same expression, her hold immediately loosening. Salted tears ran down her cheeks mixing with the sweet rain. The sound of water drowned out the chaos of the Seattle nightlife, nothing existed except their irregular breathing.

"Alec," she whimpered questioningly.

"Max," he whispered back just as unsure.

Her mouth opened and closed as she searched for something to say and his eyes were drawn to her lips. That's when he saw their blue tint and the almost unnoticeable chatter of her teeth, "I've got to get you out of the rain," he muttered getting to his feet and picking her up in his arms.


	17. Opening the Floodgates

**Disclaimer**

This chapter is dedicated to cloudburst

**Chapter 17**

Lightning crackled like whips, striking and scorching the earth somewhere off in the distance. The booming roll of thunder echoed in the small dark apartment, highlighting her form for a few brief milliseconds before casting her once again in gloom. With each flash of nature's power glinting, reflecting within those tortured brown orbs that held him captive, Alec felt the clinch on his chest tighter. 

There was no one else with them. Sketchy was no doubt at Crash and OC . . . well Alec could only guess that his friend had found some loving. The rain had soaked them through and through by the time he'd gotten to his place. She'd refused to stay in Terminal City, squirming and writhing to get away from him when he'd tried to carry her back.

She hadn't spoken, not a word since he'd found her. Her eyes were those of a despairing prey frantic to get away from its pursuers. The look a haunted child might wear in the middle of the night, listening to the howling wind and looking at the pitch-black darkness coming from the open wardrobe door. 

Alec didn't dare approach her; she seemed so desolate and brokenhearted. Mole's words echoed in his mind, _Ask anyone here who's been through it . . . Ask any X5 that was brainwashed, simplified and tortured to see if they'd turn like you . . . your old unit members that didn't make it, heck ask the clones! . . . we were living the punishments, choking on the tightened leashes . . . ask Max about her life . . . psy-ops at age 7 . . . age 9 . . . 16 . . . 19 . . . _

Swallowing past the lump in his throat trying to control his upchuck reflex, all of a sudden he wasn't quite sure if he wanted to know what haunted her, what skeletons hid within her closet, but he also knew that whether he wanted to or not, he NEEDED to hear it.

"Max?" his voice felt scratchy and unpracticed. As if he'd just regained his ability to speak after eons of silence.

The sound jolted her out of her inner turmoil and into the land of the living, her fraught eyes catching with his, paining him with the lost look within them.

She'd been off into her own world, fighting the surfacing memories, fighting the pain, trying to build the walls that had crumbled, trying to keep her falling world upright. Things she'd thought she'd managed to forget, snippets of the past that had remained buried deep inside her all of a sudden fluttering to the surface like a soccer punch to the gut.

"Max," Alec spoke again moving closer to where she leant upon his windowsill. The same spot from which he'd contemplated her, rather sudden, crash into his life.

His hand lifted toward her face and he fought the urge to flinch when she shied away, "Don't." Her small croaked whisper spoke more than a thousand words ever could. It told in agonizing detail, the anguish, sorrowful burden she carried. Showed the plaguing misery that beleaguered her. Dry tear tracks marked down her cheeks in winding paths. Taken paths of pain. His hand was still halted mid air, lips parted as his heart bet in his chest and his breath mixed with hers as she huffed raggedly.

Eyes wild and terrified she could only stare at his once again approaching hand. Too scared to watch they closed and she flinched when the soft pads of his fingertips brushed her cheekbones and traced her tears down to where they'd pooled at the corners of her lips. Chest rising and falling with each puff, her heartbeat accelerated till it bet madly.

"What did they do to you?" Alec didn't know if the question had been directed at her, at the blue lady or whatever higher power existed, nevertheless it seemed to chip at her mask that had once seemed indestructible but now crumbled with every heart beat, every caress of his fingers.

Max was fighting inside herself pushing with all her might against the floodgates, hopeless to keep them closed, to keep it locked away. The soft feel of his fingers warm upon her cheek felt so right, so comforting, and his breath upon her lips mixing with her own again sent ripples of warmth through her. 

One lone digit lifted her chin causing Max to open her eyes and meet with his. For a moment Alec was reminded of those Japanese cartoons. The thousands upon thousands he'd watched and still did. When the Technicolor characters were on the verge of tears, there were always those close ups when all you'd see was their shiny far too big eyes trembling, glinting with unshed emotion about to explode.

Max found herself in a spiral out of her control as Alec opened himself fully. He removed every wall, opened every gate, took away all the masks and facades he'd ever worn and showed himself, trusting her enough to reveal all he'd ever kept inside.

Prickling tears betrayed her and as the droplet broke free sliding down her cheek her resolve crumbled in a million pieces. Her heart, her soul, her armor shattered at once.

Max broke down melting into Alec holding onto him like a lifeline. As if he was her raft keeping her head above the murky, obscure waters of the unforgiving sea that threatened to swallow her. Chest pressed up against his, her hands curled round to his back holding tightly terrified he'd disappear. The mournful grief stricken cries only made Alec clutch her tighter. Moving back he lifted her sitting down and placing her in his lap, rocking her back and forth.

The tears didn't ease as she burrowed into his naked chest, her soaking robe, which she'd refused to shed, forgotten as she let everything she'd kept within, out for the first time. Every regret, every ounce of sorrow and grief was finally released in those tears and despairing cries.

His arms encircled her. She was as much of a lifeline to him as he was to her as he rocked her whispering sweet soothing words in her ear. The even vibrating hum of his words was calming.

"I'm sorry Max. I'm so sorry," he pleaded to her his voice cracking.

Max clung on, clung to him to stay grounded in reality and Alec couldn't have broken the embrace for anything in the world as he nuzzled his face into her neck, eyes clinched and muttering nonsensical words and apologies, "We should have never left, then this wouldn't have happened."

His pleading words snapped her out of her own shock and she turned to face him, eyes wide, red from her tears, "What?" the question was nothing but a dumfounded whisper.

Alec swallowed, his eyes searching her face as if the words he wanted to speak were written inside the coffee bean pools that swirled studying him, "If we'd stayed maybe you wouldn't have been in psy-ops four times. All of this wouldn't have happened. After the escape everything got harder for the rest of you."

Only able to stare dumbstruck the silence grew on stretching as Max searched for how to answer him. The punch across his jaw was a definite surprise, the force of the blow twisting his head to the side. Blocking the second blow Alec wrestled her to the ground pinning her down immobilizing her as she spit fire at him with her eyes.

"What the fuck is wrong with you?!" he growled at her pushing harder into her letting her know he was in control.

"What's **my problem?" she asked in disbelief noting annoyed that it had seemed to become a pattern with Alec, "You mean what's wrong with you. Perhaps the outside is affecting your brain waves. Do you know anything about what went on? Huh? Do you Alec? Who told you about psy-ops? Tell me!!"**

Anger seeped into him his jaw clenching, grasping her tighter he hissed, "No I don't. For the only reason that you won't tell me. You treat me like I'm some poor disillusioned child that couldn't possibly comprehend all that Maxie and her little nomlie friends have gone through. I escaped ten years before you, I didn't have the balls to stay so I have no clue on the pain and torture you could have suffered."

Her eyes widened at the poison in his words and the bitterness seeping from his eyes that but a few moments before had been as open and vulnerable as those of a child. Guilt stabbed at her as she saw his irises flash with pain before he buried it, "Alec I…"

"You what? If I don't know jack about you what makes you believe you know **any**thing about me?!" he continued.

Max was panicking. It wasn't small scale, it was more along the lines of 'Help I just took my father's two hundred thousand dollar car for a spin and smashed it into a police car' that sort of panic. Not that she'd ever had a father though.

Her eyes flickered each way searching for something. Anything to go back up the path they'd taken and go down the one right next to it. She'd stalled this moment successfully for years, not Lydecker, not Renfro, not even psy-ops had broken her but for some reason beyond her the man above her, the one pinning her body with his, had somehow torn through her.

Alec recognized the look, she'd worn one identical to this when she'd pulled away from their kiss and with sparking bafflement Alec realized she was scared out of her mind. He could see it in her eyes as they refused to meet his. She was going to bolt, run away and hide and not one to let her he did the only thing he could think of to stop her, the only thing he wanted to do in that moment. Letting go he crushed his lips to hers.

Passion poured through him sending scalding hot jolts of excited fear through them both. Each part of them that touched tingled and sparked, heat building and burning with the battle from their lips. ****

Max had heard of this, had read a few trashy romance novels that described what she was experiencing, but none of that seemed to be quite like the feel of his angered, frightened and passionate lips against hers. It always read that the girl couldn't describe the feeling it was so intense, and Max found herself wondering if those writers had ever actually felt it. Actually ever kissed an alpha transgenic male high on adrenaline. The latter most likely not.

It was for lack of a better term, incandescent covetousness, but even that didn't seem to bring justice to the sensations coursing through her. The extra syllables still seemed to lack.

Alec was beyond thinking, beyond feeling. His brain was broiling with images, blood pumping, his breath hitching as his body cried out for more, it was sweltering with hunger for the body beneath him, he could feel two hard tips pressing against his chest only taking him higher.

They broke apart in ragged confusion as they both drew breath unevenly still caught in a haze, "Don't run," he whispered, forehead pressed against hers, "Please don't run."

Her feelings were out of her control, everything was coming out in a tangled heap; she couldn't stop her words, "You asshole."

Alec could barely believe her sudden change and the unexpected burst of strength from below him allowed Max to get to her feet. He wasn't far behind though running after her as she stormed towards the door and grabbing her arm pulling her back, "Could you please start making sense!?"

Struggling against him she hit him repeatedly in a desperate attempt to get away, "You scare me okay?! I don't know what to do with myself around you! Is that what you want to hear?" she gritted through clenched teeth.


	18. Lost Memories

**Disclaimer**

**Chapter 18**

…Struggling against him she hit him repeatedly in a desperate attempt to get away, "You scare me okay?! I don't know what to do with myself around you! Is that what you want to hear?" she gritted through clenched teeth.

Silence. Dead, stinging, uncomfortable silence. Frayed breathing and pounding of heart beats, Alec's ears were ringing with those words as they recurred in his mind like a broken record looping the last few notes of a cheerless song. 

She was scared of him. Pain, as those words finally sunk, seeped into his irises and somehow he managed to find the power of movement and speech. Letting her wrist go his one hand wavered returning to his side, "I'll leave you alone."

His words were so final, so ultimately absolute, mocking her of her pigheaded refusal of help. Max could only watch, tears welling up in her eyes again, as Alec turned his back to her unbeknownst to her, to stop her seeing how deep her words had cut.

Silently the salty droplets streamed down her face mocking her success and Max turned and padded softly to his room not bothering to close the door. She let her body collapse onto the bed and buried her face into the pillows. His scent soaked the sheets, the scent that had already ingrained into her brain. 

She couldn't hold back, couldn't force the tears down like she'd always done and for the life of her she found that she didn't want to. Curling her body into the fetal position she held herself as she cried, wanting nothing more than to have arms encircling her, for the first time in her life she didn't crave Brendan's touch. Max Guevara, genetically engineered soldier, wanted Alec.

She'd made herself forget all those years ago, made her mind bury the memories and feelings so deep that even Manticore's henchmen in psy-ops hadn't been able to find them, so far down she'd forgotten her own name. Now, away from her childhood hell, the memories were flooding her drowning mind.

Alec listened to her pillow muffled sobs forcing himself to stay on the couch. He wasn't gonna hold his hand out to her just to have it bitten off again. Instead he focused his attention to the window and what was outside. Twilight. The time where nothing's about except a few stray cats and the city is shrouded in moonlit mystery and quiet.

At least it was supposed to be quiet. Clinching his eyes Alec yelled inwardly at his urge to fly to her side and soothe her, chase her demons away. She was still whimpering, too exhausted and dehydrated to cry anymore. Instead he swallowed the lump from his throat and lay back down ignoring the voice within him screaming blasphemous insults at him and ordering him to go to her.

He tossed and turned for all of thirty seconds listening to her cries and heavy breathing and finally tossing the blanket aside he stood up, only in sweat pants, creeping to the door and slowly swinging it open fully. The site that assaulted him knocked the wind out of his lungs.

Alec's eyes were glued to the smooth curves bathed in starlight, her skin looked silvery, her hair black, and light glinting upon her sweating skin as she sobbed unrelentingly. He was frozen in place, no more than 3 feet away from her unable to move. Could only stare dry-mouthed at the demon-plagued perfection that lay before him.

His foot twitched as he willed himself to move away but a floorboard creaked and she turned her eyes flying to his meeting through the opening of the door. Max didn't cover herself, saw no reason to, she only stared searching his irises of any emotion, like the kind she'd been allowed to see before.

"Alec… I…" she stuttered looking away trying to will her mouth to speak the words she wished to say, "I'm sorry Alec."

The X5 knew what she wanted; saw what she craved and needed but his pride forbid him from giving into her. She had the ability of speech. If she wanted something he wasn't going to make it easy for her. All she had to do was ask.

When her eyes found his again though something broke him. The desperation, loneliness and confused pain that shattered those coffee bean pools knocked him back in the metaphorical sense. Without his consent he found his feet moving, found his body laying down next to hers encircling her tiny frame protecting her with his own.

Max burrowed deeper into his embrace, her head buried into his neck, lips pressed against his skin and her frantic hands grasped his back, holding him to her.

"I'll be here for you Max, always. I'll always listen," he soothed into her ear.

His words seeped into her heart; they grabbed hold of its bleeding walls refusing to move. Her body flushed with warmth and she held on tighter, "But you won't always understand." And then the light bulb flicked on. Not the apartment's artificial lighting but the one that burst into light as the meaning of her fear dawned on him.

She feared his reaction. Feared his thoughts on what she ached to get off her chest and he remembered what the freshest coat of paint upon her walls had read.

Broken, mended,  
which I am I do not know.  
Infiltrated,  
by happiness and foe.  
Heart bleeds,  
the walls within are torn.  
Confused by my own needs,  
thought leaving me forlorn.  
Tempest rages.  
Soothed by turmoil.  
Nursed by cages.  
Bewildered foil.  
A wretched world traps my mind,  
an inward innate peril;  
Spiraling sentiment to find,  
to calm anger, feral.  
Mind forsaken,  
Heart in agony,  
winding paths not yet taken.  
Conscious mutiny.

The meaning behind the words, half lost to him Alec pleaded with her, "Tell me Max. I won't judge your past but don't ask me to forget it either. It's a part of who you are," he whispered into her hair, his hot breath tingling her skin making her close her eyes in confused excitement at the feelings it provoked.

A surprised yet relieved expression graced her face as she heard her own heart speak, images flashed through her mind as she began to tell the story and she relived every moment of her past, "My unit was more like yours than you might think. We were real close, to a certain extent; we understood we weren't related, apart from some exceptions. Like me and this X5 named Krit."

Alec didn't dare interrupt her, letting her tell the story, listening intently hoping in some small way to find a better understanding of the dark beauty that had found comfort in his arms.

"Syl named him. It was short for Kritler, which is German for faultfinder, criticize, analysis, because no matter what he always had an opinion for everything and offered it whether it was wanted or not. It drove her mad. Everyone got a name that meant something; everyone was named by someone else . . . even me," she finished in a smaller voice. Her eyes caught those of her protector and blinked up at him in astonishing – to her – security.

"Who named you?" Alec couldn't help asking and was relieved to see a small twitch of lips and a glimmer of a smile.

"My CO did," she replied, "Zack named me. There was a way in which he spoke it, no one ever said it like him, as if he was always saying it for the first time. I was his second, despite not being the oldest female; it felt right when we led our unit. It felt like instinct, and nobody can deny instinct, much less X5's," Max mused half-heartedly caught up in her own thoughts to which Alec was only a spectator. Her face told the whole story.

_The shaven head child collapsed, rippled by tremors, a surprised cry sprouting from her lips. The other children were beside her in an instant, protecting her, comforting her._

"We were gonna escape too. We had it all planned, but that night I was crippled by seizures. I couldn't even stand without help so Zack called it off. Next day we found out you guys had made it. I'd never felt so guilty, so accountable and redundant. I'd single handedly trashed my family's chance at freedom. Who knows though . . . maybe in some far away alternate universe we did escape. One thing I can say about my unit, all except four are alive. Who knows what would have happened if we'd got out," a shiver slithered down her spine and Alec found himself tensed, afraid of what she might say. 

A bittersweet grin was on her lips, "I hated you, all of you, hated with a passion. I had to hate you, because if I didn't, the only one I could blame was myself; but it didn't last. The envy burned within me throughout the whole time they kept me locked there. In psy ops for 'evaluation' they said. Being prodded and poked, cut into and tortured, shown my wounds to haunt me. Mentally tormented till I thought I was going to lose my mind. They told us why they were doing those experiments on us, told us what they were doing it for; they got us to hate you. We were being tortured because of you. I couldn't hate you though, cause you'd made it. You'd had balls and done what we only dreamed of."

Chocolate pools of reminiscing sadness stared deep into his eyes. Provoking memories he himself owned of their childhood hell. The place that had stolen their right to be innocent. 

"After 6 months of persecution, torment and agony on my body and my mind, I was out. I made the resolution to never go there again, to never go through it all again and so I became the best soldier Manticore had ever created. I pushed myself to my limits, pushed further than I'd ever had the courage to go," she continued, her voice growing colder with her words, "And as I made my way to the top, topping the records and beating the best I allowed myself to grow confident in my disobedience. Allowed myself to break the rules, to push those who controlled me. In the end, it was Zack who kept me in line, made sure I didn't overstep the boundaries; that I didn't turn from nuisance to expendable. He'd always watched my back, always watched out for all of us . . .

_"What do you mean it doesn't suit me? It's my name," Zack asked the teenage girl who stood before him. She'd just lately been allowed to grow her hair and now it reached her chin in dark brown locks to match the coffee been color of her irises. Her hip was cocked to the side and one hand sat on its jutting edge as a grin slit her lips._

_"It just doesn't. Not when I call you it anyway," she argued in amused sincerity._

_Zack straightened up to his full height, "Oh and I suppose you. Miss Smart-Ass herself has one that does."_

_She chuckled and smirked standing up straighter to challenge him playfully though not reaching his height, "You know I d . . . " a hand falling on her mouth cut her off and she didn't fight as Zack pulled them both into the door to the empty office behind them and signaled her to be quiet._

_They listened in silence to the clicking sounds of heels echoed away till finally they were out of earshot, "You oughta be more careful."_

_The younger X5 grinned, "See that's what I'm talking about. You're always there, always looking out for me, all of us."_

_"I won't always," the blonde said, his tone falling on serious._

_"That's why you need something to keep fighting them," she said sincerely causing Zack to cock an eyebrow in confusion, "To keep the demons at bay in the great metaphorical sense."_

_His brow furrowed in deeper perplexity, "Bren for lightweight, quick firing machine gun, to scare off your enemies, and dan for the twelve degrees of advanced proficiency in judo as a person who has achieved all of these. Plus it means sword blade in German."_

_The boy chuckled and ruffled her hair to her disdain, "You lot and German honestly you'd think you were German. Oh well, whatever you say smart-ass. It can be my secret codename with you."_

_Dark eyes swirled in happiness and a thousand watt smile beamed back at him, "I like that."_

. . . so I named him Brendan."

Tears were streaming down her face again even though she couldn't figure out where the strength to cry was coming from, "I was 13 when I named him. We'd just started getting cleared for short missions and we'd been on our way back to the barracks after a briefing. I'd stayed out of psy-ops till that point, though that hadn't stopped me from getting thrown into isolation a number of times but nevertheless I was cleared many times to go out and do their dirty work. In all honesty I lost count. It was on those times that I met Joshua. In the basement, where all the 'mistakes' were hidden."

She paused then as if she'd forgotten her own story, as if she'd lost her memories, and Alec didn't rule it out completely.

_She slinked out of bed making sure not to wake her only roommate. They'd been separated that day. Only two per cell, no longer did they all sleep together in the same big room and the feeling of security had been taken away, especially from her. She craved it, needed it like a parched man needed a glass of water._

_Jondy stirred slightly but amazingly remained asleep, and she crept out walking down the corridor. The young guard at the end of the hallway looked at her and raised a speculative eyebrow at the nightgown-wearing girl. She smiled at him slightly and he returned it nodding in understanding as she entered the room five doors down from hers. _

_Tom was one of the few guards that didn't need to be bought off by her and she was glad he was on duty. Entering the room, the familiar scent of his body calmed her nerves as she studied his tinted cheeks, warm from sleep._

_Sliding under the sheets she huddled into his side and not even rousing from sleep his arms protectively surrounded her slight form and she peacefully fell asleep, knowing that by the time the colonel would march down the hallway for wake up call, she'd be back inside her own bed._

"I was the only one who called him that, no one knew so it was special. We got closer, not like Jondy and me though; it was a different bond that slowly developed, though I didn't know at first. I never really got to explore it nevertheless. It was something else that was taken away from me. It took them a while to discover a far more effective method to punish me. Nothing seemed to really work, I didn't fear death and I'd managed to overcome pain, blocking and barricading myself inside my own body," she explained quietly, "But Manticore wasn't one to give up easily. So to control us, the Alphas, to control me especially, they began torturing others for our mistakes while the culprit watched."

Alec could see the memories resurfacing and flashing in her darkened irises, and found himself glad that he was getting the short summary, "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry," she sobbed into him and he realized the words weren't directed at him.

Seeing the turmoil in her expression, the lost confused abyss she was falling into he pulled her closer to him and whispered, "Sleep Max. Shhh, just sleep. I'll be right here and I'm not going anywhere."


	19. Tormenting Details

**Disclaimer**

**Part 19**

Max held herself upright in front of the mirror, sweat glistening on her skin from the artificial light above her sink. She splashed water upon her face cooling her flushed cheeks and trying to ease her out of control breathing. The dream she'd awoken from had left her shaken and her hands trembled in fear and horror as the memories continued to flood her despite being awake.

_"Rumor has it that Renfro is gonna deploy you on a solo mission of great importance," Brendan said smiling at her hiding his concern, "Not bad smart ass. Not bad at all, looks like even the high almighty bitch recognizes skill when she sees it."_

_A grin spread her lips and she looked away from his gaze, seeing the buried worry and protectiveness in his eyes, "How are you gonna manage without me keeping your sorry ass out of trouble?" she smirked impishly raising her eyebrows at him._

_Shock and insult furrowed his brow and he sputtered trying to find something to say when he noticed the knowing smile on her lips and kicked himself mentally for not hearing the sarcasm in her voice, "Why you little…"_

_With only enough time to shriek in a rather un-herself-like yelp she rolled as his body impacted with hers and he tackled her to the ground. Pinning her body down with his he began tickling her unrelenting as she writhed and squirmed beneath him unable to smother her laughter._

_Stopping all of a sudden, his head was no more than a couple of centimeters form hers, "Just come back okay?" he warned giving away the fear he had of losing her, "I promise, I'll be back before you even know I'm gone."_

Biting her lip to a point of drawing blood Max sunk down onto the floor, the tiles cold and freezing against her far too hot sink. Retreating into herself, hugging her knees she tried to shake the images away knowing that her good memories of him would end. Ripping the sling away from herself she whimpered. 

Her injuries were nearly completely healed and the scars would soon begin to fade. But like the snippets of the past Max was relieving, the memories those wounds had made, would never leave. Bit by bit, piece by piece, the holes psy-ops had left open were filling with details long forgotten. Details that tormented and comforted her.

_Being her CO he was present to see her off. He saluted her formally unlike the hug he'd let her give him before they'd left the barracks. In comparison this felt distant, unnatural to the way that her soft body had so willingly molded against his own, her fingers splayed against her back when she'd promised her return to him once again._

_Saluting in return she swallowed almost unnoticeably reminding herself that she was a soldier, she was going on a mission, she had to keep focused, but all her heart could do was replay the one kiss they'd shared. _

_Not that it had been her first kiss or would be the last. Missions sometimes required seduction as she had learned in the past. But it had been so different, so confusingly warm and tender, and those weren't adjectives she or any other transgenic could often use to describe a fellow soldier._

_Clicking her heels together she spun round and walked in her usual manner, disobedient sway of her hips advertising her femininity, towards the HUV and climbed inside. With one last look at him, her CO, her protector and perhaps a could be lover, she ignored the feeling that this was the last time she'd ever see him on happy terms._

A shudder slithered down her spine, goose bumps appearing on her skin. Alec still slept soundly in the other room and she didn't want to wake him. The last thing she wanted was for him to find her like this, to see her so overtaken with fear and grief. 'He's already seen you like this,' a voice inside her own head pointed out.

Never had she let somebody see her like this, at her weakest, no one outside of a select few from her unit had seen her helpless fighting against herself. The few accidental others had not lived to tell the tale.

_"State your designation," Sandoval horsed demanding the authority he had always tried to maintain in front of her, but she knew and she'd been playing this game since she's first met him letting him think he was in control, "X5-452 sir," she replied impeccably like always._

_"__Have you been briefed on your target?" _

_"Yes, sir. Jonathan Ducent," _

_"You have an excellent track record for solo and team missions but this will be your first deep cover. Our intelligence indicates that Ducent's been curious lately about the work we do here--asking questions he shouldn't be. Close surveillance has become a necessity," Sandoval continued unnecessarily, they'd already been through this several times._

_"Yes, sir," she continued the false pretence._

_"We've established a cover for you. Considering past… excellence, I'm sure you'll find it to your liking," she ignored his bemused expression, the spark in her eye usually hidden enflaming and growing at his intimation._

_"__Have you been briefed on your target?" _

_"Yes, sir. Jonathan Ducent," _

_Your target 452… Your only thought is our orders…_

She remembered the smug faces of the men that had controlled her life, her decisions. The men that controlled her only by punishing others for her mistakes, punishing her unit, her family, her pack.

Max felt the hatred pulse once again through her, felt the tremors the anger brought, her body racked with seizure like convulsions from the repressed adrenaline pumping, enciting her to lash out, to make the ones that had brought suffering into their lives, suffer the way they had. To make them pay for the experiments, for the punishments, for the torture.

_"The files you brought us are very enlightening, 452. Ducent's acquired some damaging information about Manticore, and has plans to alert his friend in the Senate. According to reports, he's planning a big night for you tonight?" Sandoval mused at the X5 and she had to bite her tongue to keep from answering back. She'd promised Brendan to come back._

_"Yes, sir," she replied automatically._

_"Continue the pretence and then eliminate him. You understand your assignment?"_

_"Yes, sir. It's just..."_

_"It's just what, 452?"_

_"Sir, I can eliminate Ducent at the start of the night, it seems unnecessary--" hiding the hesitation she'd shown she argued back. There was no need for her to sleep with her target. _

_"You're not in charge of this mission, 452. Your job, and your only thought, is to follow our orders," and with that sentence she knew Sandoval knew something, something about Brendan and her._

_Swallowing she buried her fear, "Yes, sir."_

_"Because if for some reason we lost confidence in you...we'd have no need for you and your unit would suffer losing such a good soldier, especially your CO."_

_"No, sir," the rage grew at the only way they knew how to control her but so did her fear and so mentally bowing her head she granted their request. No matter how much it would feel wrong and betrayal to him, it would be worse if she didn't go through with their requests._

_"So we're clear, then?"_

_"Crystal, sir."_

Flicking her tongue against the red droplet that trickled across her lip she tasted the familiar copperish tang of her own blood. A horrified shudder passed through her and Max had to fight the sounds that tried to escape her wavering lips remembering how she'd disobeyed her superiors and paid attention to her own will.

_Men dragged her kicking and screaming through the halls of Manticore and into a rwhite walled room as she struggled against their hold. Sandoval watched her with a disappointed stare. _

_Her struggling stopped the moment her eyes fell onto the bruised and bleeding body within the room, "See what your actions have caused 452? You're a traitor, you killed a member of your own unit, someone you loved. You killed Brendan."_

_No breath entered her lungs, air refused to fill her body and she wheezed in a desperate attempt to draw in the much needed oxygen. She felt the burst of energy splitting her jaw and the taste of blood in her mouth but felt no pain. The anger, fear and hatred she kept within her overwhelmed her heart and mind and she lost control of her own body._

_The sudden surge of power that erupted out of her small frame sent the men holding her flying off her and before they'd even realized what had happened she'd snapped all of their necks; pure animalistic instinct driving her to avenge the damage they'd caused._

_Men rushed out of nowhere tackling her to the ground as she stepped towards Brendan's still body. TAC soldiers grabbed his body indifferent of his head as it slumped lifelessly while they dragged him away._

_A soft moan widened her eyes as she saw him draw in a breath. Tears streamed down her cheeks and she growled in restrained potency to get to him despite the men holding her back. _

_"BRENDAN!!" she screamed terrified and full of released emotion. Emotion she'd had to keep hidden, emotion that had reached the brim and now overwhelmed her._

The convulsions shook her body, hands turning white as they gripped the seat of the commode and her diaphragm dry heaved. Gagging on her own tongue she gripped the ceramic. The grime made her hands slip, her fingers curling tighter around it to steady herself. Creaking under the pressure of an X5 fighting to control her own body the old ceramic shattered. Hands falling to either side supporting her body the contents of her stomach came up.

Her hair hung limply plastered to her sweating face and neck as she hovered over the broken bowl emptying her stomach with enough force that she spat out blood.

___You are nothing 452… you are a soldier… soldiers don't have feelings… they don't have the capacity to love… you're poison… Brendan's death is your fault… it's all your fault… your actions._

_Soft smile upon his far too pink lips as he trailed kisses on her abdomen. The silky texture of his blonde hair through her fingers made her shiver, "Brendan." _

_The intimate glow of the room turned to harsh and she squinted trying to see past it, "He didn't have to die. It's your fault he died you got attached."_

_Fists and boots bet at her battered body as she hung limply on the chains that cut into her wrists, head swinging back and forth as she spat out blood. Her body was inflamed in pain and in that moment she welcomed death with open arms. She craved the blissful everlasting sleep she'd given a total of 34 senior officers and human soldiers including Sandoval._

_Nothing mattered to her anymore, she'd failed him, failed Brendan and her family. Death would be salvation._

_The laser seared a path into her eye, pain shooting through her brain stem and down her spine, as she struggled in vain against the restraints. Rough hands shoved the horse bit into her mouth blocking her screams as the images began flashing past her eyes. Her body convulsed in the chair fighting against the pictures flashing. _

_Images of his body, sounds of his screaming, of his gurgled gasps as blood filled his mouth. The straps held her down in place and the laser was incandescent. She fought, battled the images… DUTY… DISCIPLINE… MISSION… TRAITOR…_

_"You are nothing 452… you are a soldier… soldiers don't have feelings… they don't have the capacity to love… you're poison… Brendan's death is your fault… it's all your fault… your actions."___

Alec rushed into the room concern and worry etched onto his face as he rushed to her side. His hands pulled her hair away from her face ignoring the little voice that told him Max wasn't gonna let him see her like that without complaint or physical violence. 

Retching sounds echoed off the old tiles of the bathroom contrasting with the soft soothing hushes Alec mumbled into her ear brining her back into the real world and out of her mind.

Empty of any sort of substance Max collapsed in a sweated heap next to the destroyed toilet breathing harshly and her eyes half closed in exhaustion, "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to break it," she apologised surprising him. Those were hardly the words he expected.

"It's okay. I'll get OC and Sketch another one. You don't look to good either," he muttered with a half smile to which he received a much smaller one in return, but it was progress nonetheless, "I'd like to see how you look after harking the past week's meals."

Smiling at her hoarse come back he brushed a stray strand of hair off her forehead, "You need a shower. Come on I'll help ya up," he said pulling her to her feet. She swayed dizzily and light headed trying to remain upright by herself, "And it looks like I also need to get some food into you."

"I . . . I can't do it by myself," she whispered not meeting his gaze, "I need you."

Those three little words pounded at the walls she'd already tore through and Alec could only dumbly nod his head and croak in reply a small, slightly fearful, "Okay."

**A/n: I think my muse is back!!! Yay for Jet Black peoplez!!!!******


	20. A Simple Need

**Disclaimer**

**Part 20**

Her feet were still wobbly, the flashing memories and vomiting had left her nauseous and Max didn't trust her legs to keep her upright. Even as she told herself those reasons, her mind knew that wasn't the complete truth to why she had asked his help. Her plead for him went beyond a shower.

Max needed him; to keep her grounded, keep her in reality but even more than that. Holding his gaze she could see the trepidation in his eyes, the frightened swallow of his words and the croaked okay were a vast difference to the passion he'd kissed her with. She could still feel the warmth of his taste on her lips, the frantic sensual movement of his mouth trying to convince her without words.

Her hands gripped his forearms for balance and he swallowed thickly as he looked into her eyes looking for confirmation. Only a long t-shirt he'd given her kept the dark angel's beauty from him. He breathed in slowly and let it out again as he saw her nod, his hands going to the hem of the shirt.

Max held her breath, the soft noise of her gasp sending the hairs on the back of Alec's neck into frenzy as they stood on end. His fingers brushed soft firm flesh inadvertently as he pulled the fabric higher staring in her eyes too afraid to look anywhere else. She trusted him and there was no way Alec was going to betray that trust and think with his little soldier.

Max lifted her arms in the air to let Alec slide the shirt up and over her head. The almost imperceptible swoosh as it hit the floor prompted both of them to release the breath they'd been holding. Hands reaching out to steady her Alec's eyes filled with barely masked desire, restraint to kiss her deep and sensually the way he craved despite berating himself the whole time.

She was his sister's clone and that by default should make her his sister too but no matter how logical that seemed it also seemed completely irrational and untrue. She was so different from Sam and yet so alike in certain ways. Max held the fire that had extinguished in his sister.

So caught up in his inner turmoil against his yearning he missed the same emotions glint within Max's chocolate irises.

"Max," his voiced rumbled through her, low and rough with nervousness, jolting her, "What do you need me for?"

A million reasons sped through her mind, a million answers to his question but she wasn't ready to voice them, wasn't ready for the consequences they would bring. 

"Stay. Don't leave me," she replied quietly like the frightened child she felt and his words calmed her worried heart, "I'm right here." 

Taking her smaller hand in his he curled her fingers onto a handle so that she could keep her own balance for a few moments and taking his own shirt into his hands he lifted it over his head and soon it joined her already discarded one. Always keeping his eyes anywhere except the curves of her voluptuous body, Alec rid himself of his pants as well leaving him in boxers.

A small frown at his scarred leg upon her lips brought his eyes to his own injury, "Ahh it's nothing compared to what you had. I've had worse anyway," his nonchalant smirk brought a smile to her lips, it felt so right for him to do that, as if he'd always been supposed to smirk like that.

Eyes trailing upward he saw pure golden flesh and supple curves broken only by a black upside down triangle. A low blush, more a flush of excitement then embarrassment and he looked away, awaiting the slap. Chuckling furrowed his brow and he dared to look her in the face.

"Alec I'm not going to hit you if you look at me. Otherwise I wouldn't have asked you to help me shower," her words relaxed him and a mischievous smile set into his features as he realized what she'd said, "So I get to help too?"

It was her cheeks' turn to redden and she stuttered for something to say as visuals of what that could mean flashed past her eyes, "Shut up."

********

Jondy's feet lay comfortable upon the table in front of her. The old leather chair she sat in croaked and groaned in protest but stubbornly refused to collapse. Terminal City was growing more and more by the day and it had barely been a month since the burning of Manticore. The X5 was certain that it was going to grow a whole lot more as transgenic word spread of the growing community that Max had created in this wasteland.

They'd hit White's headquarters before he'd had half a chance to attack them and so far there was no word on him or even whether he'd made it out alive. The ordinaries were still seemingly ignorant of their existence and it seemed like all their bases were covered.

Jondy wasn't stupid though. This was going to get a whole lot worse before it got better but Maxie was at the front of it all. She was alive and still kicking and it would take more than the Sector cops or even the National Guard to take them down. Transgenics were not called enhanced for no apparent reason. 

She had no doubt they'd be able to hold their own end if it came down to it, but in all honest to god truth, there were a whole lot more humans than them and now it seemed they faced a greater threat with what appeared to be a breeding cult as old as human evolution.

They were free though and she knew each one of them would fight till the end to stay that way, she thought watching the mismatched group of people in headquarters through Max's open office door. For now they were free of torture, pain and control. Freedom was never free but they'd take what they could get and do their living where they could.

A quick knock startled her and she turned to the head of dark hair that stepped into the room. He was dark with broad shoulders and a laughing glint was in his eyes paired with a small twirl of his lips.

By his age Jondy knew he was an X5 but she'd never seen him before despite his face seeming familiar, "Hey, can I help you?"

The male X5 straightened his shoulders before shrugging, "Don't know. I'm looking for Max. They say she's in charge around here."

Hiding her disappointment she smiled charmingly, "And what do you want from Max?"

Grinning he sat down on the side of the desk, his eyes never wavering from her gaze, burning into her with passion and life, amusement swirling in their chocolate depths.

"As rumor goes she doesn't hate the class of '09 and that in fact she's dating one of 'em. I was hoping to find her boyfriend, he's an old friend of mine," he spoke voice deep and rhythmic. 

The light bulb switched on and Jondy smiled, "Max isn't in at the moment actually, I'm just trying out her chair. You're a niner huh? Should have figured as much," Jondy stood and circled the desk never breaking the stare, "It's the eyes that give it away, the attitude. I've met four… well five now of the elusive class of February '09. Apart from the ones that were left behind that is." 

His eyebrow raised and his head tilted studying her, trying to gauge her intentions, "And which ones did you meet?"

A look of contemplation crossed her face and she smiled, "First there was Cyd, your CO, formerly known as 765. I know her clone she's in my unit, 766 Eva. Then I met Pix, they brought her in when she was in the late stages of progeria; weak and nearly dead so it didn't take long to break her. Hard assed bitch she became, such a colonel's pet."

The darker X5 stayed silent but she could see the barest hint of his emotions flitter through his face. All the rumors had been right; Alec's unit had been close, like family, like hers' was. The only difference remained in the fact they'd seen each other more as a pack than brothers and sisters. Jondy called Max sis but she knew there was no genetic link whatsoever.

"Jesse was the one with the kid. I saw her twice only, once when they brought her dead body back to Manticore, and a second time while Manticore burned down, they'd resuscitated her. And then there's you."

A spark of excitement and joy filled his eyes hearing of Jesse's survival. Curiousness filled his irises and he stepped closer looking down on Jondy, his breath tickling her lips and cheeks, "That's only four. You said five."

"The last is rumored to be dating Max, Alec," she whispered, "But I find you a whole lot more fascinating."

"And why is that?" he husked his lips brushing against her earlobe as he spoke, his cheek pressed against hers, "Because you're not head over heels for Max."

Pulling back he stared back into her eyes again and leaned against her other cheek nibbling her other lobe between his lips, "I'm Biggs."

Her hands wrapped behind his neck and she moaned pushing herself against him, "Jondy," she hushed crushing his lips to hers, her foot kicking out to close the door.

*****

Stepping into the spray Alec watched it begin to hit their bodies, the hot droplets felt like heaven as they beaded his skin. Pounding away the tension from his shoulders and aching limbs. It had been a couple of days since he'd been able to indulge in this and he sighed relaxing. 

She clutched to him gently for support and gazed at the water cascade over his body. His eyes seeking hers sent flutters through her stomach and she clutched to him a little tighter. Alec's hands shook nervously as he picked up a soft cloth. The mango scent of OC's body wash flitted to their noses and Max gave a small smile in appreciation.

His body was screaming simply by looking at her, by the feel of her small fingertips holding onto his arms, and his mind searched in desperation for something on her face to show him what to do. The loud thumping inside his chest was deafening to his ears.

Never had Alec thought he'd take a shower with someone as beautiful as Max and not be able to act on his attraction. He thanked the blue lady for every ounce of control he had over his anatomy and thanked that he hadn't rose to the occasion… yet. Seeing her flesh dripping with water in all its glory in front of him was divine torture.

There was no way he was going to embarrass himself in front of her. She'd given no real indication that the few kisses they'd shared would be repeated in future and Alec didn't want to push his luck with the scrounge of friendship they'd built. A reciprocated understanding of each other. 

As she clutched his arm for balance though he had to swallow past the lump in his throat. She trusted him, trusted in him.

Max's mind was spinning, not from the nausea as that had long since gone, but from the situation she now was in. Small flashes of the past flitted occasionally into her mind but she was too focused on the present to relive what had once been.

The water flowed down his body ruffling his hair in disarray and continuing it's downward journey. Across golden, taut skin covering sheer power of transgenic muscle. Velvet covered steel. Rivulets streamed further over nipples and creases of muscle and got caught in the hair that began round his navel.  

Transfixed in the sight in front of her, the sound of beating water drumming in her ears and the touch of steam, Max's instincts took over her mind. She craved his fingers upon her skin and his lips against her own. Max wanted the touch of her kin in that way again, she needed it.

Her hands released his arms and Alec watched in fascinated trepidation as they took his calloused ones and touched them to her skin. Max moved the open hand that held the cloth in large loose circles across her abdomen trying to ignore the flush of excitement and the nerves his touch ignited.

In that moment nothing existed except the slow rhythmical movement of his hand upon her flesh. Nothing except the deep stare of his eyes into hers.

Alec's eyes sparked, as her face got closer to his. The way she looked at him was full of desire and need. Almost a hunger and ache but he had to know, he had to make sure, "Is this really what you want? Am I what you want?"

Her soft puffs on his lips sent chills through his body as she spoke, Max could see the fear and joy in his eyes, hope growing shadowed by doubt, "I'm going on instinct Alec and it's never led me astray. All I know is that this feels right, being with you feels right."

Her words fluttered in his stomach raising the hairs on his neck and down his spine.

The contact of her bee-stung lips on his was exactly like he remembered, lightning to his senses and Alec realized this was something he wasn't going to forget any time soon, no matter what happened in the aftermath.

It was in that moment that Max's heart opened. In that instant she knew that this was everything she'd been missing, the chance she'd never been allowed to fulfil with Brendan, Zack. There, with Alec, consuming the heat, the ache, the need for each other, releasing who they were, what they were, with no fear of what might happen.


	21. Fight For Freedom

**Disclaimer**

**Part 21**

Heads turned as Max strode into Head Quarters. No one even pretended to be doing something else as they watched the X5's quick, graceful step unusually light; and the softened features on her face for once undaunted by the past.

Her lips were quirked ever so slightly as she acknowledged Mole but her thoughts were focussed on earlier. They'd awoken lazily to the sounds of OC and Sketchy arguing having returned home from JamPony. She remembered Alec's surprised expression at the sounds of his roommates. 

They'd both completely forgotten about them. When they'd first arrived at his apartment they'd both been sound asleep unaware of the transgenics' presence and by the time they'd awoken both had been gone. Thinking back on it now Max had slept more and deeper in the last few days than she normally did in a month and now fully heeled she had enough energy to take on the National Guard by herself and win. 

Sleep within the next 4 weeks was unlikely which suited her just fine. Alec on the other hand was gonna be in bed a whole lot more frequently especially if it was up to her. Laughing at her own thoughts she smiled.

Grinning at Joshua she headed towards her office her mind still on a mere hour ago. The look on OC's face when she'd stepped out of Alec's room dressed in his clothes, the other X5 on her trail the duvet wrapped around his lower body, had been for lack of a better word, spectacular. He'd walked her to the door, a genuine smile on his lips as he leant against the frame completely aware of his friends' stares as he bent down and kissed her.

"I know nothing's fixed but are you alright?" he'd whispered against her mouth.

"I'm always alright. I'm going on instinct," she'd whispered back catching his mouth again welcoming the unfamiliar flush to her skin and flutters inside her.

"And what does instinct say?" he'd asked seriously but partly amused.

A devilish grin had spread her lips then as she'd rubbed her cheek against his and bit on his earlobe tugging tenderly, "It says I should really go before Jondy begins to worry," seeing his crestfallen expression pulling back she'd chuckled moving to his other side and repeating the same torture grinning at the shiver that passed through him.

"And it says Alec," she'd nibbled and caught his gaze again.

"Alec?" he asked confused, "Yes Alec. Over and Over and Over again."

Her lips had sought his again flicking her tongue against his before breaking the kiss and walking away leaving a stunned Alec on his doorstep.

She'd laughed whole heartedly at OC's exclamation that she'd heard despite the black woman thinking she was out of earshot, "Would you care to explain ya sorry ass to OC cos 'dis girl is damn confused!"

Max had no doubt that in a few minutes he'd make his own entrance. In the time she'd taken stopping by her apartment and changing out of his jeans and shirt, he'd most likely shared what had happened with OC, dressed and followed her. Strolling up to her office door she swung it open fully intent on relaxing while she waited when a sight she'd never thought she'd see assaulted her.

Her jaw fell; her eyes bulged as she stared speechless at the sight in front of her. Losing all capacity for thought she gaped at the spectacle of human flesh displayed upon her desk. Noting all her papers in disarray on the floor the ability to think hit her '_I am never touching that desk again.'_

So caught up in themselves they still hadn't noticed her, her trial to coherently form a sentence was abruptly cut off by an arm to the small of her back. Startled she yelped betraying her presence. Jondy and the man she was temporarily interlocked with started in surprise. Alec's eyes drew to the scene that had halted Max in her tracks, his eyes widening, "What the…"

In a sad attempt at modesty the two exhibitionists tried to cover themselves but all that caused was their undignified tumble to the ground on the other side of the desk, "Oh… oh god... so did **not** want to see that…"

Max's stumbled exclamation was halted by two voices unanimously yelling back, "Well close the fucking door!"

Alec slammed it shut still shocked and they both simultaneously turned their backs to the door standing side by side as if on guard. Curious eyes sparkled at them confused over the chaos that had ensued only moments ago even as Max decisively made clear that it was none of their business.

The blonde X5 was still in utter disbelief over what had just enfolded. He'd come into HQ ready to march up to Max and tell her and instead he'd gotten an eyeful of her sister and seen Biggs in the buff after 12 years of not seeing him at all. There was no doubt in Alec's mind that the man who had previously been occupied 'pumping' pleasure in Jondy was his brother.

Only one person on earth had that birthmark and in the brief few seconds he'd been able to watch, the four-leafed clover shaped darker patch of skin had stuck out to him like a deranged orange cat running in circles in a blue room.

"So… ahem," he cleared his throat scratching his brain for something to say as she met her gaze, "That's something you don't see every day," he finally finished lamely ruffling his own hair.

The grin that split her face furrowed his brow and Max erupted into laughter finally unable to hold it back in. The loud mirthful laughs that shook her frame once again captured the attention of the room. 

Alec couldn't help the chuckle her contagious hilarity brought upon him, and suddenly he too was laughing uncontrollably to the point of silent laughter with tears streaming across their cheeks. Stumbling to the floor he sat heavily Max falling upon him as they cackled away like mad hatters.

Mole watched a smirk on his lips circling the ever-present stump of cigar as Creek wafted the greenish smoke away from his face in disgust, "See whaddiditellya?" 

"Mole you know that if you removed that thing from your mouth your words would have gaps between them and you'd make a whole hell of a lot more sense?" Creek replied ignoring the obvious 'told you so', "Besides I never said anything against it."

The whole room suddenly followed suit as the door clicked open and Jondy and Biggs' faces appeared. This time fully clothed they grabbed their respective sibling quickly half walking, half running out of HQ.

Tongue in cheek Max was having trouble not laughing. It had felt so good to laugh hard like that and she was having difficulty stopping. Her comrade in arms was in a similar situation every time he stole a glance at the unamused faces of Jondy and Biggs.

All the darkness was forgotten, only the incredible amusement of the situation.

"Okay that's enough guys. It's not even funny," Jondy warned her voice exasperated at the two currently being dragged by her and the man she'd just met and swapped body fluids with, "Looks like we're not the only one's who got laid," he whispered and her face broke into laughter as well.

******

Ames White painfully sat up. His face battered and scarred, deformed by his enemy's unexpected power. Rage boiled inside him as he traced the swollen contours of his face, his chest heaving in pain merely breathing. Bet within an inch of his life.

The transgenics were stronger, smarter, more organized than the conclave had expected. Information that by all rights they shouldn't have suddenly made them a threatening force that needed to be dealt with and fast.

His father had fought almost to the death to keep those creatures alive before he'd disappeared and now his son was determined to fight to the death to destroy them, the hate for his own blood nursing it.

***

**Epilogue**

I sit comfortable at our usual table in crash. The whole Jampony gang is here, all my friends and now so is my family.

I still can't believe I'm back here, back at Crash, living my strange little life but I never figured it could get any stranger; it's like I've been given a second chance. To start everything again and this time do it right, live it right. With my people, my family. 

A sensual shiver runs down my spine at the fingers that brush the back of my neck devilishly toying with the sensitive skin over my barcode. Her smile is amazing as she directs her full attention to me and I can only see her. Only Max exists, only the smooth caress of her fingers, the strange melody of Lenny Kravitz on the speakers.

**Little girl with heroin so blue **

**You've got to find the future in you**

OC grins knowingly in my direction before turning her attention back to a drunk Sketchy trying to convince her to hand him the pitcher. Biggs raises an eyebrow at me and the girl on my lap and I shrug innocently.

I miss my family, my unit, but finding my brother's given me hope. A lot of things have given me hope.  I give him the same look in return as two arms hook around him from behind and he cockily matches my smirk.

**Your sceptres and needles will put you away **

**Forever and a day**

Never thought I'd be here, with her. I'm not stupid though. No way that a few skeletons in the closet and troubled pasts are our only troubles. Just cause Max made mashed potatoes of that psycho doesn't mean they're gone and I still have to ask her about Renfro's suitcase. 

The public isn't going to remain ignorant of our existence indefinitely but something tells me with Max at the head of it, she'll pull us through it. I trust her with my life and I'm not the only that thinks there's something more to her, something special, something different.

**Your future will haunt you before you get there **

**Imagine a planet with no air**

If there's anyone that can lead us into the future it's her and even as I think this I can't help but be surprised. I started out thinking of her as the projection of Manticore and all that I hated. And now I think of her as the messiah. The idea itself is ridiculous and yet strangely logical. I'll do anything to keep her safe, keep her demons at bay, and keep her grounded in reality.

**All mute no light no sun only night **

**As far away as never land**

Chocolate coloured hair, coffee bean brown orbs of endless emotion, mocha skin and devilish lips. Dark angel. Keeping me out of the spiral of self-destruction. In a sense the reason I'm living for. The reason to keep going. Like she's my own personal cheerleader and the thought of her in one of the little outfits evokes a chuckle out of me.

I haven't told her any of this yet. I'd planned too but the unexpected display of flesh had distracted me. I still intend to tell her but I don't know how yet. Something tells me she knows though and she feels the same way. I don't need to worry that she doesn't know. Max always knows, probably why we got together.

When I was with Asha I always had to worry over what she might be thinking I was thinking, worry that she'd get the wrong idea. I loved her, and that will never change, the same was that Max will never stop loving Brendan but I'm happy. Someone understands me and I understand someone. A communal understanding of each other.

**As the sky comes tumbling down to the head **

**And the valleys are all filled up with dirt**

**As many people as there are sands in the sea **

**Will die the morning after **

**Yeah **

**So little girl with heroin so blue **

**I guess our future is all up to you **

**Through the battle sequence you must fight **

**'Til the morning turns to night **

**So imagine our world with no air ******

**Just follow the son, He'll take you where **

**The night and the seas are all full of light **

**'Til the morning turns to night **

**'Til the morning, yeah, turns to night**

The television screens flicker and the white red and blue banner appeares for the first time in a year. But the eyes I'd been expecting were unfamiliar and familiar at the same time. People cheer at the welcomed appearance but I'm the only one that knows it isn't him. 

Logan Cale is dead and there's only one other person apart from me that knew his alter identity. A smile comes to my lips as I stare at Asha's eyes and her disguised voice, "Do not attempt to adjust your sets. This is a streaming freedom bulletin. It cannot be stopped, it cannot be traced and it is the only free voice left in the city…"

This whole thing started because of the great fight, blah blah woof woof, and it looks like that's the way it's gonna keep going. The fight for freedom.

**The End**

Thankyou so much to everyone who read my story and an extra thank you to all those who reviewed. I finally finished this baby and I have to say I'm relieved. I never thought I'd get there. I dedicate this chapter to absolutely everyone who even read just two lines of it. But extra big hugs of thanks to scarlet who helped me get the story straight and onto the track it followed. Thank you to Andrea826 for the challenge of this story... you're the best, reviewed every chapter with no exceptions, I always looked forward to your feedback. Panda, Alicia, Astra and acandybag too. Jewel21 lol... I'll keep in mind that you just can't say no to NC-17. cloudburst thanks for finding my muse again.

And everyone else who reviewed me…

Loustar at band camp legit, coxxy, isilme, Brin, ethereal, Meow, eden, Mackenzie, caderyn, The Goddess Bastet, Ella, mel, CindyZ, kim, dealio, kay, Professional Scatterbrain, Dragonfaerie, jen, Ashley, yup, ACB, ghosty girl, Ellashy, angiosperm, serotinin, rosie, holl00, Kirstyn Paul, Sam, liz, pinkassbitch, stellyn, x-cat, naudhiz, di-era, fuko, urban fire, chooky, Emerald, Aithlin, yippee, Eden, cait, columbine, Lauren, Adriana, Little Kat, fichic, Savage Midnight, Dragonmage, missy miss, chocolate-addict, a reader, Big Sister, cheeza, mara jade, ting, wicked sista, messymissy, bo, ally, msredux. And all you anonymous people!


End file.
